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The Two Sets Of Seasons

      Many of you are going through No Mans Land Right Now (Days 30-130)

This is the second hurdle of a longtime/forever quit. The first hurdle is getting through the first 30 days.

      When I quit, I was constantly researching information for when you were through the worst of quitting. One medical study I read during that time, said it you made it through 4 months without smoking you had the best chance of a forever quit.

      Along with that study, I noticed there were so many people losing their quit and dropping off the site I was on before reaching four months.

      I had my personal breakthrough at 128 days when I was driving up a hill to a job I had still been a smoker on.

      I reached for a ghost pack and realized I was no longer a smoker. I laughed.

      The term No Mans Land came from the person (Ron Maxey) who wrote a powerful post and gave it that title on the site I quit on.

      No Mans Land Will Be Over For Many around 130 days. For some it's longer/For some slightly less.

      We smoked for a long time and we can't expect to have experienced every trigger in the first 130 days.

      We have many memories that are connected to smoking that we must  unlearn by making new ones without smoking.

Let's talk about two sets of seasons.

      I suggest to you that you have to go through two sets of holidays and seasons. During these two years you will likely experience a family blowup, the infidelity of a spouse/partner, a car accident, and the death of a pet or someone close to you that would normally set you off.  In other words, the hard parts of life.

Example: You have a relative that ticks you off and they are missing from your first annual get together. Well, they may be at the second years so, that's the implication of what getting through 2 years means. 

      The one thing to remember is, smoking is not required. You know if you smoke, you will be a smoker again.

      After your first year, your quit should not be such a fight anymore

unless you've fought quitting all along. There may still be some fleeting thoughts of smoking but they are now easily dismissed.

You smoked a long time. It will fade away. Be patient.

Nothing and no one can make you smoke! You are in charge.

STATISTICS: While roughly 94% of uneducated smokers who attempt to stop smoking relapse within a year, the relapse rate declines to just 2 to 4% per year from years 2 to 10, and then falls to less than 1% after 10 years. Wow! Chance of relapse goes from 94% to 2-4% after two years.

http://whyquit.com/FFN/chapters/FFN_14_Relapse_P.pdf

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47 Replies
Giulia
Member

Not too many????  Are you kidding?  40 days of freedom is what you wished you could achieve on day one.  No?  Maybe you didn't even think that far ahead.  But most of us couldn't even imagine 40 days of freedom.  Just hoped, one day, we'd get there.  You HAVE gotten there.  Throw your head back and rejoice in it.  Yes, it's still probably hard at 40 days (it was for most of us), but you just keep on the path.  In my experience - I've lost three quits (not lost, gave up!)  at the 90 day mark.  That was a very vulnerable time for me.  But I learned that that time is  a fragile time for many.  I also learned that I can't have "just one."  The last time I learned that lesson - I never had to repeat it.  That was back in 2006.  May you never need a repeat lesson.  

elvan
Member

dljensen‌  40 is HUGE...remember how far away you thought that was when you first started...Giulia‌ is so right.  I gave up too many quits to count but the biggest difference between those and this one is EX and the support and education I found here so readily available.  Once I accepted that smoking did nothing FOR me, only TO me, it really made it easier.

Congratulations on YOUR DOF!

Ellen

dljensen
Member

Quit/gave up at least  three times, patches, film strips, gum and lozenge. Plus Chantes pills. No more sickeretts, No deathsticks for me.

dljensen
Member

Hi, did you  stick with it? I'm  only at 43 days  or so , just  wondering how  it's going?

   Dan 

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Lindarivera
Member

I am on day 63 and I’m still using the patch and I chew 1/2 a piece of gum when I have a super strong craving.  I’m worried about trying to get off the patch - I finally feel safe in my quit and don’t want to screw it up by getting off the patch.

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The patch only gives you nicotine, that's all it does. 

It does give you a respite from the physical addiction while you gather your thoughts.

But, it doesn't make us think of smoking less.

Here's what I would recommend.

Don't get locked into thinking nicotine replacement is the cure to quit.

If you happen to forget to wear the patch is when you can test yourself.

I forgot my third day but they were only 10 minutes away so I didn't panic and got through the day.

The next day I felt shaky and put one on.

The end of the second week I forgot two days in a row so I put one in my wallet with a promise I would out it on rather than smoke.

If you just get tired of using it, it's fine to test yourself. You can always put one on right? So what's the harm? 

How else are you going to know if you're ready to stop using them?

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Lauralives
Member

43 days is amazing dljensen!!!  There is no ONLY concerning days when you quit!! :}

sweetplt
Member

Read this over and over ... it’s an oldie, but a goodie...Thank you for sharing .

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elvan
Member

The season changes can be a ridiculous trigger...going into spring and summer were the hardest for me because I did not smoke inside and those were the favorite seasons...as well as fall, winter, not so much.  I quit during a Polar Vortex so my first spring posed some challenges but I had, by that time, accepted that smoking did nothing GOOD for me.  The two sets of seasons are very real.

Ellen

AnnetteMM
Member

I still appreciate all your ideas in this post, Dale!

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