I have had a rough summer, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It feels like slogging around in concrete that's drying quickly. I can't say that those things have gone away but I've finally relaxed a little, at least not hanging from the ceiling like a scared cat. This month was overshadowed by my father-in-law's death on the day before my husband's birthday. I wanted to smoke then, but I didn't. This past Sunday was our 35th wedding anniversary. We both forgot until about 10 am and said happy anniversary to each other. The day was like any other weekend day. Outside and inside chores. I think dinner was what we call 'scrounge night'. Kinda wanted to smoke then, but didn't. We celebrated his birthday this past Wednesday, well there were brownies and a gift. Still thought about smoking but didn't.
This coming Monday we are headed out of town for a few days. Finally, time to decompress a little. We are going to see my favorite heavy metal band, Disturbed. We're leaving the day before the concert so we can get there and maybe do something together. Concert day I try to keep pretty low key. I'm not a late nigh person anymore and head banging takes a lot out of ya. Unfortunately with my neck and shoulder being in such bad shape I believe the headbanging will have to be mental. Fits right in with me. I mean everyone tells me I'm mental anyway
I no longer want to smoke. Sometimes it takes everything we have to fight the addiction, no matter how long you've been smober. Even though I really wanted to give in it was worth the battle to say no. Not today, not tomorrow, not next week, not EVER AGAIN. Keep the quit and Rock On! \m/
