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Taking out the trash

alysonoholic
Member
6 10 117

Yesterday I walked my trash and recycling to the dumpsters. That may be normal for you but I've actually been driving it over since I moved into this complex because they are halfway across our entire complex so they've really seemed soooo very far away and I usually have a few heavy-ish bags to take over. Recently I decided that I am going to walk it over as soon as I have a full bag so it's out of my hair and I can get a little extra exercise while I am at it.

Today marks 30 days since I have had a cigarette or alcohol. I mostly quit drinking because I knew how vulnerable I am to "social smoking" but now it just feels...right, I guess. Saturday night I went to a big ol' party where I didn't know very many people but I wasn't as anxious as I usually am going in and when I did start to think about bailing I went to my car, did a quick guided meditation and just got my ass back in that moment. Sunday morning I woke up to Bread and the beautiful sun with a weird sense of accomplishment and absolutely no regrets. It feels like another form of taking out the trash, really...

I'm doing really well, friends, and I am increasingly excited about how awesome my life is and can be as a non-smoker. 

I hope all of you are safe and sound today and I am popping in here to thank you for helping me reach my 30 days again! I'm sure I'll be here regularly as I trek through NML.

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About the Author
This is actually my third wind on becomeanex.org - in February 2013 I quit for over 6 months before relapsing and realizing I was going to have to start all over again. And then that happened again. So, I'm back here to get at it. I've tried quitting so many times now it's not even that funny. I had basically been smoking since I was 13 (so, 25 years now) and was tired of letting something so stupid and expensive run my life to the extent that it did. In general, I am a pretty healthy person. I work out regularly, I eat well most of the time..it just seemed ridiculous to keep subjecting myself to being stinky and ultimately sick. I know cigarettes don't actually bring anything positive to my life, it was just hard to think of a future that didn't include the habits I had built around them. But now that I am 38 I am determined to live a healthy, well-balanced life and take more time to enjoy my home, my friends, my 2 cats, my city and a life free of cigarettes.