Questions and Clarifications

Blog Post created by Strokeinthefamily on Apr 8, 2018

I woke up at 2:30 a.m. after 3 hours of sleep. Myself and my family are all very concerned about the care mother is receiving at the skilled nursing unit she transferred to last Wednesday following her stroke/brainbleed Feb 19th, 15 days in ICU, 29 days in an Acute Rehabilitation Center and now 6 days in skilled nursing. She was to only be there a few days to be evaluated so she could go back to her assisted living apartment she shares with my father in the same facility. The care she is receiving is inadequate as she should be back in her apartment Monday or Tuesday and is not even close to the needed landmarks necessary for her to go home because the skilled nursing unit is doing little to nothing to rehabilitate her.


I don't know about this site being tolerant of hearing the details of its members problems that interfere with staying focused on our quit. If inappropriate for this forum then quite frankly, I am in the wrong place. Please let me know. I don't mind moving on to another resource.


I am my parents power of attorney and as such responsible to be their advocate. At the same time my husband, an ex smoker since May 21st, 2010 due to end stage COPD and an fev1 of 9% to 11% ever since, bladder cancer in Dec 2017 and suffers adrenal insufficiency since 2015 due to prolonged need for steroids. Adrenal insufficiency means his adrenal glands produce no cortisol when he is stressed whether the stress is negative or exciting or happy. My demeanor with him I have to control and stuff many of my feelings he cannot cope with. The effects of adrenal insufficiency are scary, altered mood, feinting, weak and SOB. Just great.


I am overwhelmed with responsibility and have delegated responsibility as I go, when possible. I share my stuffed feelings with the Lord in prayer and my 4 accountability partners and hopefully here.


I quit smoking for a very few hours and went out and bought a pack late last night. My quit date is April 15. I quit Jan and Feb 3 times, 5 days, 3 days and 15 days in that order. With NicodermCQ and supplemented with nicotene lozenges.


My friends and family believe quitting smoking now is not a good idea because of all I'm dealing with. I have told them smoking adds stress. They do not understand but support me. I have been waiting for a good time to quit, that is why I still smoke, so I'm quitting come what may.


I have four friends that live nearby as accountability partners I text daily how many I smoke each day. They are awesome and creative and have never smoked a cigarette in their life. What fun we had when I reported 15 days in a row at zero! I relapsed when mom in ICU day 7. As to my relapse, the sweetest thing said to me is isn't it wonderful we can have a fresh start? No judgemental attitude. Just gracious and kind. I need that.


Some here on this forum are quite aggressive in their responses. I understand the frustration of dealing with addicts, oh, did I mention, I have a son addicted to meth, as are his 3 children, and another son an alcoholic, pothead, occasional cokehead. All have above mentioned are felons due to the addictions. So I understand fully how frustrating it can be to counsel or be around addicts. However, I'm an addict as well. I tell them that when they beat themselves up, I'm no better than you, just a legal addiction. 


I have been successful quitting but added this forum to my latest quit, because I relapsed when mom in ICU and I see bigger things, bigger losses, greater responsibility in my future and quitting will make those events less of a burden.


I have been up most of the night reading, reading tools, tips, faq, expert blogs, member blogs. I have a questions about the week before you quit, actually a statement, I will not be throwing away my cigarettes and lighter until the quit day. I don't smoke inside and until the last 2 weeks, not in my car either even though driving is a trigger and I drive way too much. 


Well, now what?