Rough Saturday

Blog Post created by Sandy-9-17-17 on Oct 15, 2018

Having a daughter with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)  and then self diagnosing my own self with the same thing as I learned of her illness was a hard truth.  She can flip a switch during any conversation.

Well, she came by on Saturday, and I have been holding 5 packages of hers that have been delivered to our home, (she doesn't live there)  and because she owes me money, I told her that if she gave me $100 out of the $430 that she owes me, I would give her the 5 packages!  It's obvious she has money to buy things, and things that she doesn't necessarily need, but yet owes me money from almost 2 years ago.  

Well, she didn't like that I told her that, and she screamed and yelled at me, and wished me dead!  

How does one cope with that!?  I am not doing very well, but one thing that never came to mind to handle the anger, the sadness, the bitterness, and tears, was smoking.


While I have grown apart from this disorder, she unfortunately has many more years to go with it.  I wish it didn't hurt so bad, and her words keep playing over and over in my head.