Maryangela

FOURTY DAYS!

Blog Post created by Maryangela on Jun 17, 2017

Lordy, lordy it's been FOURTY!  FOURTY DAYS since I've smoked, that is.  I'm having a difficult time and today has been no exception.  I am so disgusted with myself for still feeling this way after FOURTY DAYS.  My parents, whom both smoked for 50+ years quit about eight years ago,  my mother told me last week that I should be over this by now!!!   Well, I'm not even close!  I wake up and go to bed wanting a cigarette.  I'm the most disgusted with the ten pound weight gain, I've worked hard to lose weight, for what, so that I can just put it back on one pound at a time?  I've slept most of the day away today, as I have fir the last 40 days.  If I'm not sleeping, I'm eating.  I have a hip with severe arthritis, so walking is usually out of the question.  I swear I just don't know if I can do it!  The depression, the weight gain, the lack of desire to do anything....it's just simply unbelievable!  I NEVER would have thought that it would have been so difficult.  FOURTY DAYS, $336.00, 1,223 cigarettes, 18,354.65 mg of tar not inhaled and I'm doubting myself to win this battle.  

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