I failed to mention that I watched my Father die a slow death from emphysema. I vowed to not let that happen to me.
My sister has chronic asthma, has since she was 12 and she used to smoke as well but doesn’t anymore.
I watched my Mother have a heart attack back when I was going through EMT school. She never smoked but my father smoked in the house at that time.
In the end, my daughter never met her Grandma (my Mom), she died when I was six months pregnant with her. Grandpa died when she was 2-1/2 years old but even then she never really knew him as he was in a nursing home in poor health, couldn’t see much and couldn’t breathe. I have pictures of them together but she doesn’t remember him.
Staying smoker is the right thing to do. I want to be here for my daughter. My “why” has been replaced with “resilience”.