~~Do you know what happens when you decide to stop worrying about what other people might think of you? You get to dance. You get to sing. You get to laugh loudly, paint, write, and create. You get to be yourself. And you know what? Some people won't like you. Some will laugh or mock or point out flaws...but it just won't bother you all that much.~~ Doe Zantamata
When I was a newly single mom of three little ones, I lived in an apartment complex in Panama City. One of my neighbors was a lady named Margaret. She was also divorced and had a seven year old son. The other neighbors didn't really like her. They said she was 'weird' and had strange ideas about parenting. She let her son paint her fingernails and sleep in bed with her. She was a no-nonsense, hard kind of person. I liked her but had a fear of ending up like her....cynical, weird, alone.
Over the years, I came to better understand Margaret. She had no knight in shining armor to save her. No prince charming. No family to encourage or support her. So she made a life for herself and her son that worked for her. No excuses. No apologies. She did what she felt she had to do, regardless of what people thought.
When I quit smoking, Margaret's philosophy was what made all the difference. I stopped worrying about what people thought of me. I stopped thinking someone was going to come in and save me. And I got busy quitting in a way that worked for me.
No excuses. No apologies. Some may think that's weird. Harsh. Lonely. But it's none of those things. I danced. I sang...loudly and a lot! I got to be myself.
Sometimes new quitters can be so wrapped up in getting to know people here that they worry more about what the elders think than what's best for their quit. Sometimes they hesitate to ask questions because they don't want to be labelled "weird". Sometimes they get so excited about quitting they take every piece of advice to heart yet lose themselves in others' quits instead of their own.
It's ok to be you. You don't feel comfortable blogging? That's ok. Just read and learn. You don't feel comfortable questioning the elders? That's ok. Educate yourself simply by reading. You having too easy a time quitting and worry that you're doing it wrong? Not at all!! Let others know that it's ok to be ok just as much as it's ok not to be ok
I grew up to be like Margaret and I'm proud of that. I'm a 'no excuse' kind of person but that's because I have no one who is going to save me when things get tough. I need to get things done...or they won't get done. But I also have a soft side that loves the pretty, the wonders of the world, the heart and soul of others. I'm only as weird as I want to be. I'm me. And I quit smoking by being who I am.
I hope you....yes, you, the silent one reading this...quit smoking your way. Find what's best for you and just do it Be like Margaret. It's not a bad way to live at all!!