Going Backwards

Blog Post created by Barb102 on Aug 9, 2018

Even at 203 DOF !  I still have challenging moments and circumstances. Don’t we all?  But at the end of the day, I take so much pride in my quit and myself. I guess I never really believed I was strong enough. But I am!  


I started off scared that I wouldn’t make it , so I couldn’t say NOPE in the beginning. I had to tell myself just for today. I’m not going to smoke today. To say never again , at the beginning of my quit , would not have worked for me. I could not, at that time, envision a lifetime of not smoking. So I pledged just for today. One day turned into two days. One week into a month. NML hit me hard , but I kept fighting for my quit. I had too. I worked so hard for it. I knew I could never start a quit again. I knew that in my heart and soul. So I fought day after day. 


I like to to look back at my first few blogs. I was so scared that I would fail. I had many moments that I reached out for your help. I took your hands , not cigarettes. I kept fighting.  I read the older blogs I wrote and I choke up. 


It it is true - that anything worth having is worth fighting and working for. I wanted this so badly this time. I knew, (I was told) I wouldn’t live long unless I stopped now. Wish it had been sooner ,but glad it’s now and forever.  


I’m “going down the shore” next week. I’m not scared of vacation. I did it in June!  You see everything I do for the first time prepares me for the next. There will always be new challenges. That’s why I know I need a full 366 days.  I’m going to walk on that sand and leave my footprints. They look so different now  They are good footprints of a woman who was blessed with strength, courage and wonderful people like you. I hope that I will leave footprints filled with hope, kindness and compassion behind me. 


I hope that I can help just one person who reads this keep their quit. Then I’ve truly made a difference!