23 days!

Blog Post created by AmandaJ23 on Jan 18, 2018


 The last few days haven't been easy, the universe is testing me. It started on Friday. I got in a fight with the hubby and even though we were able to sort things out pretty much right away,  we were both on edge all weekend. Every time he walked through the house smelling like smoke I wanted to drop kick him. I wanted to smoke SO bad. So I washed all off the walls in the house   . We were fine Monday evening. I'm back to easier days. 

   I have been dreaming about smoking. Nothing else is happening in these dreams I'm just smoking all night long. I think it might actually be making me feel better, maybe because I'm not getting any satisfaction from those dream drags. During the day I think I go hours without thinking about cigarettes though. It blows my mind that I can go about my day and out of no where the nico demon says "time for a smoke!" Right out of left field. This confuses me more than it makes me want to smoke.

  Apparently I'm inspiring people to quit. My mom is down to 1 a day and my mother in law has been slowing down as well. Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy that they are quitting, and I'm excited that they'll be healthier but it really does feel like I'm under a lot of pressure to stay quit. This can be a good thing as I strive under pressure, however I have been known to crack ! I'm just going to keep cheering them on and try to stop looking for the negative in everything. I hope everyone is having a great smoke free week!