That magic cigarette and update

[Chuck-2-20-2011]

Good day EXers!!

There was once a time when I believed that I couldn’t face life’s problems without a cigarette. Somehow I believed that the cigarette had some magical power, capable of transforming me to a place where everything is so much easier. I mean if something bothered me, all I had to do was light a cigarette.

I never really thought about the problem actually going away. I simply smoked to make it easier, or so I could concentrate on the problem more effectively because somehow, that magical cigarette seemed to make it so much easier to cope with problems. And after I was finished smoking I knew I felt better for at least ten minutes. That’s when the problem suddenly seemed to magnify again to the point that I of course needed more of that magic.

And on and on the illusion remained, keeping my mind from thinking of any kind of reality as I steadily increased my addiction, as if I could smoke myself out of any problem or enhance any activity simply by indulging in an addiction.

And the addiction just grew and grew. That’s the lies of addiction. Of the brain trying to make sense of its own destructive actions by creating the thought that the cigarette is somehow helping us!

With every cigarette that we smoke, we feed the lies of our addictions. Every time we use a cigarette to help us through a problem, we feed the lies of our addictions. When we smoke to become calmer, we feed the lies of addiction.

This is why one by one, we have to see through the lies that we created for ourselves. One by one we have to understand why we created those lies in the first place for that is the foundation of our quits.

I believe we have another word for those lies. We call them triggers. You see, when we feel the need to smoke it’s simply a response to the lies we’ve told ourselves for so long. We have to understand that there is no magic cigarette that can magically transform a problem into something more tolerable.

It’s simply an addiction that’s killing us, so long as we let it.

So the next time you feel a crave, try to see the lie that’s associated with that crave. If you can find the foundation, or lie of each of your craves then you’ll have the knowledge to sweep the rug out from under that crave.

Quitting is a process. One that we have to understand completely in order to succeed. Take the time to learn and you’ll find success. Find what makes your addiction tick, and it loses its power to sway you. For every thing you learn to do to combat your addiction, you’ll find the journey that much easier. It’s no cakewalk but it can be done and the rewards at the end of this fight for your life is amazing!

ONWARD TO FREEDOM!!!

Chuck

UPDATE

I have quite a story to tell you about the disappearance of my daughter Falon. Most of you know how it was for me on my end, but I wanted to tell you what happened to her because I think with all of the support, thoughts and prayers you’ve given both me and my family. I felt your strength through the entire ordeal and my heart was touched by the caring and compassion of all of those who didn’t even know her.

Now that the search is over, and I’ve had a chance to deflate a little I wanted to share this.

Falon was lost on the high mesa’s in one of Colorado’s wilderness areas. She first got turned around up there during the day, and then it began snowing and got dark. She took a wrong turn and ended up high centering her vehicle on a jeep trail.

She stayed in the car for the first night using the heater in her car to stay warm. The next day, she honked her horn and hit the panic button for the alarm on her car every half hour, thinking someone would hear it. She had no idea how deep she’d gone into the wilderness.

On the third day, she realized that no one was going to happen by so she decided to try to walk out. The snow on the ground caused her to lose the jeep trail she’d been travelling on and she became even more lost. She had no hiking gear or anything to help her with this. She did end up with a bit of frostbite during this time.

She told me she heard a bird and for some reason felt compelled to follow it. The bird would fly ahead and then come back to her. She followed this bird until she found a gate. She climbed the gate and followed a road that was more like a trail to three converted buses.

She realized that It was starting to get dark so she broke into one of the busses. Inside she found a jar of peanut butter and a couple of bottles of water. She spent the night in that bus and the next day she had to break into another one in search of water. Over the next days, she broke into all three busses, and took the supplies.

On the last days, she found a hunting cabin on the same property. She broke into that one and found more supplies and some stuff for survival. She had hurt her knee when she high centered the jeep and she wanted to let it heal a little. There was no cell phone service in this area.

She stayed in the cabin for the remainder of the two weeks. During that time, she said a kind of voice spoke to her and told her things like when to drink water, when to get some exercise and she says the voice even told her every time there was a tick on her. The voice even told her when to walk out of the wilderness.

She told me that she believed it was God that saved her. That cared for her and comforted her. She found a bible on the way out of the cabin. She’d never read the bible before. She left a detailed note to the owners of the cabin including how to get ahold of her, and she started walking. She ended up going in a circle. She sat and read part of the bible and then started walking again.

She eventually found the original road that had brought her there and started walking toward the town she thought was closest. It was six hours before anyone would stop. In fact, the one that did stop hadn’t even seen her. She scared the heck out of him when she walked up and asked for help.

He took her to police station and we picked her up!

So that’s what happened to her. Me? I’m slowly getting over the emotional and adrenaline hangover. Feeling pretty good today in fact!

Oh, and by the way, two days before all of this started, we had welcomed a new dog to the family. The poor guy felt all of the stress that we were feeling, right after coming out of the shelter. He’s a great dog. Very well behaved and actually kind of a lifesaver. Whenever my wife saw me getting too obsessed with the search, she’d tell me to take the dog for a walk. Found out that walking a happy loving dog really can be a stress reliever!

Now, off to build a little fence for him.