I want to thank each and every one of you that helped me over the year to get me to where I am today. My time spent on this site has finally reached its end. I will pop in from time to time to shoot you a link to something that helped me along the way to those that are twirling, going in circles.
For those of you struggling to maintain your quit or even trying to reach the year mark, please realize that quitting is a process. It doesn't end overnight, after NML, after you reach a year. It's imperative that you come to an agreement with yourself that you were once dependent on nicotine, you will be psychologically dependent on nicotine if you maintain that hold on it. Cigarettes do not calm you, relax you, comfort you. You only THINK they do. You are the one giving them the power. You are allowing them the power.
Take the time to figure out the why, understand the why, take the why out of the equation. It's the why that's screwing you up, the why I smoke. Make a list of all the reasons why you smoke, why you light up. Take the time to figure it out. It won't take long, but put some effort into it. Use the NRTs as a tool, an aid, something to only assist you in quitting smoking. There is nothing created anywhere that will take the physical withdrawal away. They will make it easier, but it's still there. You need to go through that month to realize how your body has been affected. The body is a wondrous thing. It can rejuvenate itself.
Think of yourself as a crumbling wall. As you continue to keep smoking, you're breaking apart bit by bit. When you quit, each bit is being repaired slowly. You may never be the complete wall as you were before, but there will be a pretty good resemblance of it. Dig your heels in. Finally decide for yourself that enough is enough. No one likes to be controlled. Conquer this one last important fight, this war, once and for all. You are the conquistador. Stop the merry-go-around, the see-saw of quitting.