No one ever accused me of being under-enthusiastic about most things. And I have become someone who listens to all requests for volunteers and thinks "well, someone has to do it, why not me." Now remember, I work a 45-50 hour week and I spend approximately another 2.5 to 3 hours a day commuting. Last week my volunteer activity about did me in. Tuesday was the election, which I referred to in my last blog; Wednesday I went to my daughter's to essentially write a paper for her because she's been so sick and has been pursuing an online degree, and had a paper due. Then I worked 10 hour days on Thursday and Friday, and on Saturday I did a 7-hour volunteer stint working bingo - on my feet for virtualy the entire time, being treated like I wasn't fast enough so getting pushed aside and barked at to do something else (I'm WAY not used to being treated that way, but things were going sideways with the volunteers and I didn't take it too personally. The real issue was the screaming pain I was in half way through the night. I actually left there crying I was in so much pain. Sunday I stayed in bed all day. Monday was my day to work at home, and to tell the truth I was so fatigued and actually sleepy that I didn't really get much done. Yesterday I woke up with a migraine so was down all day, and today, finally, I'm starting to feel like myself again. I worked a solid 9 hours today, so I'm somewhat redeemed. Heading in early in the morning (I leave my house at 6 a.m. to be at work by 7:15 to 7:30. If there's an accident or any kind fo issue on the road, I might not get there until after 8. (when the're no traffic it's a 40 minute trip.)
So this probably doesn't have the slightest thing to do with smoking, but maybe the overarching smoking element is that aside from the fleeting moment of wanting a smoke I did not consider smoking to make this week any easier. And while at this particular time I feel like my old body is falling apart, if I were still smoking it would be way worse. I have NOT smoked something like over 5,000 cigarettes So the point is your quit is part of everything you do, because every day you aren't smoking you're doing something radically different than what you did (in some cases a LOT) for many many years before. And as far as I'm concerned all that time smoking, planning for smoking, counting the moments until I could get away for a smoke, etc., etc. was, sadly, a big fat waste of time. I'd like a nicket for every time I said
I'll do it when I finish this cigarette." Then I should get another nickel for every cigarette I smoked AFTER I said just the one more. Add that to the cost of the cigarettes and I could actually be retired now. So essentially I smoked up my retirement!! Aww - that's sad. But I am still your happy quitter. A tired, overworked happy quitter.
Love to you all.
I need to remember a couple of things. I am just about 68 years old; I have COPD and arthritis, bad knees and a bad back. I work a very demanding job. So I think I need to dial this volunteer stuff back a little until at least I'm not spending 12 hours of each workday fighting traffic and working non-stop from the time I arrive at work until I leave. Don't get me wrong -- I really love my job so that's not a problem. I also feel a responsibility to give back, but I think I need to strike a better balance -- oh, and I've volunteered to manage two activities for our December Charity Auction at work.
