Sigh

[tigs]

Well, I slipped up. I want to be honest, because I know otherwise, I'll start telling myself it was OK. See? It really didn't do anything bad, and then addict brain will have the upper hand. Long day at work yesterday, and I really didn't feel well (detox, I think..sore throat, a bit of nausea, dizzy...), then had to run out immediately to a birthday party for a 9 year old "adopted" cousin. I actually thought about begging off because I was just sooooo tiiiiiired. But ended up going because his uncle just died, and wanted to help give him a good memory after the funeral. EVERYONE there was smoking!!! (except me..). Hubby and I left after a couple hours. I worked on some stuff on the computer before going to bed, went downstairs to do laundry. And there was this cig right THERE! Half under the dryer, and I lost the battle,. Got it, lit it, took 2 puffs, and thought what the *%&% am I *doing*???? and put it out. Munched it! Mashed it!! Brushed my teeth and went to bed.

I think my big mistake was not going to bed when I got home. I was sooo tired. Once there...I couldv'e gone and talked it out w/ hubby, or come here with you guys....I messed up, but back on the wagon.

*sigh* This sux. Back to day one on the counter for me, for 2 puffs (cause I'm an idiot)