What I learned today: when I take excellent care of myself, my quit is effortless. If I give myself exactly what I need, take the time to prepare a healthy breakfast, pack a great lunch, pace myself with clients, drink green tea and lemon water, go for a walk or run, hang out with my family...not smoking is the most natural thing EVER and the realization that I don't smoke anymore is so uplifting.
Today wasn't one of those days. Taking good care of myself isn't natural, this is all new to me. My reasons for doing things has been largely motivated by the needs of others. Co-dependant to the core, was I. What I learned from seven failed quits was that my nicotine pacifier kept me comfortably numb and passive in situations or relationships with people who didn't have my best interests at heart. (Myself included)
So this quit, I dealt with most of the things I needed to change before I actually threw out my cigs. I quit smoking during the happiest part of my life. What a difference that has made! It's 44 days today, and although I have had a few difficult days, it's been relatively smooth.
I still struggle with feeling proud of myself. My goal this week is to OWN my quit, to be proud of my willingness to do something so wonderful for myself.
Tomorrow is looking better, already.
