Hello all! Just thought I’d check in and also wish all of you a smoke free holiday! Thinking back, it’s been an amazing journey. It all seemed so hard in the beginning. In fact, leading up to my quit date there were many times when I wondered if I’d actually put out that last cigarette. There was the fear of changing my life. There was the fear of losing a friend. There was the fear of wondering what I was going to do with myself.
But you know what? I feared for my future as a smoker way more then any of the other things. I saw my future carrying oxygen everywhere I went. I saw my life losing it’s luster as I continued smoking. I saw the confused and scared looks on my children’s faces as I wasted away from the deadly effects of my addiction. I saw the looks of those medical professionals as they cared for me on those last days of my life; the looks telling me that they knew I only did this to myself simply because I chose an addiction over life.
But I wasn’t losing a friend. No, instead I was losing the biggest enemy of my life. The one that would rob me of my breath. The one who would shorten my life. The one that only wants to feed the brain with death. So no, this was not losing a friend at all! And man, was I fooled before when I wondered what I would do with myself. Since I quit I’ve had so much time for writing and reading. I’ve found a sweetness to life that I always knew was there but somehow missed because I was consumed with addiction.
So yes, I made it to that first day and the moment I did it all my fears went away. Over time the addiction lost it’s ability to sway me. Sure, it was tough at first. Anything worth doing usually is. But over time it really does get easier. I can’t say the day that I knew I’d won. The day that I knew I’d never smoke again but that day did arrive and it was worth the wait. The only thing that can derail my quit now is myself.
If your just starting out on the journey to freedom then let me tell you that so long as you stay true to yourself, you WILL get your life back. You WILL feel that stronger you. You WILL feel a freedom that is so wonderful that you’ll wonder why you didn’t do this sooner.
So hang in there my friends. Fight the fight for your future. Always look to the freedom that awaits you. I was a two pack a day smoker. I was really hooked so I know that if I can quit, you can too. Do what you must to win this fight.
But be careful of the holidays. There are so many possible triggers there. Don’t give in this year and next year will be one of the most wonderful holidays you’ve had in a long time simply because you’ll feel better and most of all, you’ll be free!!!
