Man, what a day it was yesterday! At 5:30 P.M. we got a call from the hospital. An older man who lives with us was ready to come home right away. This took us a bit by surprise. We knew he would eventually be released but they gave us no time to prepare. He had a toe amputated and will need a lot of help for a couple of weeks.
So I became his advocate since he had no one else. Needless to say, the stress was really there and yet there was no need for a cigarette. The idea popped up once or twice through the evening and was of course dismissed easily.
This is because I no longer associate smoking with stress. The two really do not belong together. At least not in my reality. I learned early on that one of the keys to quitting is to disassociate the cigarette from the triggers. In reality this is easier to do then one might think.
The method I used was straws. That’s right, straws. I’m sure you’ve heard others mention this but it really worked for me and here’s how it worked. I placed a few in a plastic bag and carried them with me. Every time I had an urge that was directly associated with a cigarette I would reach for one of these straws. I don’t really pretend to smoke them or anything like that. I simply reach for them when the impulse to smoke struck me in the past.
It was really an experiment at first and turned out to be something that worked well for me. Don’t get me wrong, I still get the occasional urge but that urge no longer translates to giving myself an addictive substance. It really doesn’t have to be straws. It can be anything that we can reach for instead of a cigarette. The main thing is that we disassociate the triggers and urges from cigarettes. Once this is accomplished a big part of our battle is won. At least that’s how it was for me.
I don’t even think of reaching for cigarettes anymore. In fact, about the only time I do think of them is when I sleep and that’s only in dreams. The dreams are simply my mind working out the details of my new life without cigarettes. It’s the mind calming that part of the brain that never really agreed to quit smoking. It’s the mind retraining the addict within I think.
And so today I will go out there and take care of things for my friend, confident that no matter how much stress I encounter I will not smoke. I might find myself breathing in some sweet air, but there will be no cigarettes.
What started out for me as a battle within my own mind for control over my own life has now turned into that future that I thought of when I first decided to quit. You know, the one without cigarettes in it. I’m now living that future that I created over three months ago and it feels good. I know in every part of my being that I made the right choice when I decided to quit.
I know in my heart that I will never be a smoker again. It’s just not a part of me anymore. And I’ve learned how to deal with the addict within. To keep him close but always in the background and with each passing day, this too becomes easier. So almost all of the goals that I set for myself in the very beginning are now so close to completion.
And so I can say once again to those of you that might be following on the path that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There is a time down the road when we can feel peace within our hearts. There really is a new life awaiting you if you can just get through those first few weeks and having made it this far I can tell you that the discomfort you might be feeling now in those first hard days. That feeling that it will never end. These are things that I can now say from experience do pass. These are things that do end. The light is indeed at the end of the tunnel and it’s the light of freedom from ourselves. It’s the light that contains all of the newfound wisdom that we pick up along the way. It’s the light of our futures and so long as we never give up on our quits then I can promise you that this light is brighter then any light we’ve ever seen for this is the light of success and the light that is created when the addict within is at last calmed.
Keep your quits close to your hearts. In the end, I can already tell it’s worth it!
