New to Become an Ex

[amanda57]

I am excited about joining this website. I love the open feel of it all, the fact that I can open up and be totally honest with my success AND failures in the quitting process. I have tried quitting before, failed and ended up being a closet smoker for months on end because I was too embarrased to admit that I had failed to anyone around me. I am the mother of two boys (7 and 2) and just found out I am expecting baby number three. Quitting smoking is the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, the only close second to that being watching my father die slowly from cancer when I was only 15 years old. I started smoking myself 3 years later, talk about feeling stupid. I have tried other stop smoking phone hotlines and communities but I just end up lying to whomever my sponser is, telling them I haven't 'slipped' or started again while smoking a cig with them on the phone! My quit date is Sept 15 and I have no personal support from anyone in my life except my 7 year old son so I am hoping to gain that through this group. Good luck to all here and I look forward to getting to know the other mothers! Okay I guess that's all for now...sorry to ramble on...I'm actually trying to distract myself from smoking right now :>).

[shanna77]

Amanda,

Welcome, I have also set my quit date for September 15. I have been trying to cut back little by little. So, when the day comes it won't be such a shock. I am also a mother of 3 young boys 4,5,& 8 years old. The thought I have of not seeing them grow up scares me to death. Keep your spirits high. I have had nothing but good responses from everybody on this website. Keep in touch and remember you have so many things in your life that are worth quitting for. Keep in touch and hopefully we can support each other. Cause I know when the day comes I will need someone to talk to. My husband is also quitting the same day. So we may be a little irritable towards each other.

[amanda57]

That is awesome that your husband is quitting with you. My boyfriend is unwilling to quit and really isn't very kind about keeping the smoke away from me either which will make it so much harder. Something about him being a 'grown man' and 'doing what he wants' that old song and dance. But I don't care maybe he isn't strong enough to undertake an obstacle this big but I AM. (Though maybe if I can convince u I can convince myself?? LOL) I have cut back to 3 or 4 cigs a day too since I found out I was pregnant a week ago and that has been very hard so I am scared about the quitting all together. Mainly I am sick and tired of being controlled by cigarettes and evil tobacco companies. I want to quit with all my heart but still doubt my ability to do it cuz I have failed so many times before. what if i fail again?

[shanna77]

All I can say is everybody fails. But they keep trying. I know exactly what you are talking about with having to be around people that smoke. The last time I quit my husband would still smoke in the car. Which drove me nuts. But of course I never really said anything either. I actually hid in my house for like a week. Then as soon as I went around my Mom and my bestfriend. I was right back where I started. So, hopefully this time I will be stronger and have more support from my husband. Which I hope will make it easier. I put my start date for the 15th cause I didn't want to throw my body into shock. I just went on Weight Watchers and I have people on this site telling me to suck on hard candies. But I thought if I keep my self busy I would start leaning away from the cigarettes little by little. Cause when I am active I don't smoke at all. If I go somewhere with my kids and were walking around I won't smoke one cigarette. So I am keeping my hopes up. Cause I definitely don't want my kids to smoke.

[amanda57]

Thank you so much, you have no idea how much your words of encouragement and support are helping me...well i guess that's silly...you do know how much it helps....your in the boat too!! LOL! I felt as though waiting and waiting for sept 15 to come had become like mental torture for me so decided to just try and make today my quit day instead...i'm very proud...made it all day without smoking even once!! It was actually easier than the cutting down...i mean easier to just not think about getting ANY cig than spending all day long waiting for the time to roll around when I could safely have another one. I feel the craving really taking hold as I go into this evening...but just keep reminding myself that if I break down and smoke now all the work i did today will be in vain and i'll have to start over again tomorrow or the next day. i seem to have a feeling that if i can just get through the first week...i might be able to do it this time!

[stephanie33]

I'm with Shanna77, this website is AWESOME. My quit date is Sept. 22 so I am not far behind you guys and my husband is quitting with me also. I just hope that we don't end up divorced or killing each other. Good luck guys. I want to add you to my friends list as well. Thanks.

[shanna77]

Yes, that is very true. They say that after 3 days the nicotine is out of your system and the rest is just mental. So just remember that everytime you crave a cigarette just jump online and start talking to someone. Until the craving passes. I am still shooting for the 15th. Cutting back doesn't really bother me. I am thinking about trying gum. Cause I really don't smoke during the day. My time is evenings, too. That will be my hardest. Cause I usually go out and have a cig. when my kids are driving me crazy. Well keep up the good work. I will keep praying for you. I won't say you can do this. Cause YOU ARE DOING IT!

[rachel17]

I told my partner that if the kids are driving me nuts and I am wanting to have a cig that I will need help. I said that I may need to escape the situation. I will leave and go for a walk or something. I expect her to then handle the kids till I get back. Maybe you could get your husband to agree to do the same for you?

[shanna77]

Well the problem with that is the only time they really drive me crazy is when he is gone which is a good 3 times a week during the week to meetings and sometimes Saturdays for work. They behave alot differently when he is around cuz he has got that deep voice that gets there attention. My voice just gets higher when I yell so I think they can't hear my frequency. HA. I may just have to go in my bedroom and lock the door for about 5 mins.

[shanna77]

Hi Stephanie,

We thought if we did it together it would be easier. Except for wanting to kill each other part. Cause I know I will be very irritable. Everything he will probably do will get on my nerves. In the past when he tried to quit his idea was to stop buying cigarettes then everytime we went somewhere he just would bum a cig. from someone else. Defeats the whole purpose as far as I am concerned. We just realized last night that we have 5 days left. I am excited and I am up for the challenge. So Good Luck to you both!!