Help! I'm not strong enough for this!
You found this site, you set a quit date, and you are asking for help. No way are you a chicken!! Sounds more like a determined warrior to me Focus on your breathing, it will calm you down. Remind yourself you can do this...because you can. And feel proud of yourself for making it this far. Every step matters.
You do NOT need to be strong Fortunately, you only need to be willing.
If in your own mind you are willing to be free from nicotine, you will.
One step at a time. Read up on everything you can here. Have a plan for cravings. I used Tootsie Pops and Twizzlers.
Others here have had other plans.
It is doable. Truly.
Welcome to the community you've made the best decision that you'll ever make in your lifetime and it's definetly the best gift that you'll ever give yourself which is the gift of LIFE, we're all here to help you in any way we can deep breaths, keep your mind as well as your hands occupied and at the end of today you'll be able to say YAY for DAY WON with many more to come believe it......
My Welcome To New Members (12+ Years Of Watching)
Hi there little.mama !! Welcome, and congratulations on your wonderful decision to quit smoking!! It is the best gift you can give yourself... EVER! Not to mention your loved ones, but this one is for YOU .
Good for you that "strength" doesn't have much to do with it. Education, commitment, mindset... those are the keys to building a strong, healthy, forever quit. Brute strength gets you only so far, and most get tired of the struggle.
It is difficult... there's no question about it, but if you stick around here, read and post, you will find your "strength" in the support you get from others who have been, and those who are, where you are now. We're all here to say "YOU can do this. If I did it, so can anybody". I was chicken too. I smoked for many many years thinking I just couldn't quit, or didn't want to, or needed to smoke, or whatever excuses to keep smoking. but I've quit, and have been quit for 7 years. So even this lady who was determined to be the last living smoker in my state, who said "they'll pry my last cigarette out of my cold dead hand".... I say again, quitting is the best thing I've ever done for myself!
Stick around, read and educate yourself, follow all the tips and tricks you will be given, and take it one step at a time. We say "one day at a time" but in the beginning it can be one minute, or one five minutes, or one craving at a time. Do what you need to do in small steps to begin this wonderful journey!!
Welcome to our community!
Of COURSE you are strong enough - but you do need to be committed - and to use the tools we can provide here; education is the KEY. I will give you lots to read, and I think you will be better prepared to be successful after you have completed it. I believed that I was going to be the last smoker standing - and I am looking now at a 7+ year quit!!
The important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it online or at your local library. If you do nothing else to get ready for your quit, please do give this a read. It made a world of difference in how I thought about smoking, and quitting. I (and a lot of others here) credit it with a good bit of our success.
You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmoking.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. Here is a video to inform you further about nicotine addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpWMgPHn0Lo&feature=youtu.be.
After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort after you have tried to delay and distract. I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another. You need to start out with a plan to reduce use of them over time - which the patch does by decreasing the dose contained in them.. For the gum, you can start by cutting each piece in half, then in quarters, then sub regular gum of the same flavor in between, adding more and more regular gum. For the lozenge, you need to start subbing a mint in between to begin, increasing the number of them over time. I do not recommend the e-cigarette for four reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire and 4) you can become addicted to that and it has not yet been proven safe .
The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced. Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T. You need to distract yourself through any craves. You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game. Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time. You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits. Get busy! Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas: https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instead-of-smokeThe conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?" Then DO it. You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.
Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!
Thank you! How do I get through the cravings?! I get through 1, then and 15 minutes later I have another craving!!!
Welcome to the Ex. You've already gotten great advice. I hope you're still hanging in there. It's not easy, but yes you can do it. That's why it's so important to educate yourself about nicotine addiction and have a quit plan. Knowing what to expect on this journey and being prepared can make all the difference. I believe that's why I've failed in the past. We go into this blindly without the knowledge and support we need to a non-smoker. You did the right thing by reaching out BEFORE you smoked. That's how this works. Stay close.
You got this . And your are strong enough to stop
Day 3 for me and yes the first few days has been heck. I woke up this morning and the withdrawals feeling weren't that bad. I have felt worst when changing blood pressure meds.
Keep reading up and don't be afraid to ask any questions.deep breathing And walking alot helped with the jitters I had.
Stay trying to figure out how not to be too tired. But,I have to admit I did get a nap in earlier today and feel a little stronger.
You got this quit. Keep fighting.show the nic demon,who is the stronger one.
You have received a lot of good information above me...keep us posted...how are you doing ? You can do this...I was you 334 Days ago...Colleen
Ok. So I failed yesterday and this morning. But I had my boyfriend put the patch on me at noon, and I put my smokes in the back of a drawer. Wish me luck!
Does your boyfriend smoke?
Putting your cigarettes in the back of a drawer likely won't keep you from discovering them.
There is no luck.
Once you quit there is no reason to have smokes. Don't be afraid to let go of them. I know it can be scary.
little.mama there is no luck involved sweetie, do the suggested readings and work...it will help so much...also, get rid of smoking paraphernalia...give yourself no reason to smoke...You can do this...gotcha in my thoughts ~ Colleen 334 DOF
When you put your smokes in the back of a drawer the option to smoke is not only alive and well, but it's easily accessible. Why would you put your smokes in the back drawer unless you expect, suspect, you'll go get them at some point?
When we agree to quit smoking, we agree to get rid of those items that enable our addictive behavior: cigarettes, vapes, ashtrays, lighters, etc.
Question for you: Why did you put those cigarettes in your back drawer? And after you answer that question for yourself, think about whether it's the wisest choice for overcoming this addition, or whether it's an enabler to relapse.
Personally I feel that if we leave the option to smoke alive in our heads it not only makes our quit more difficult, but more easy to forfeit. For me, leaving a pack of cigarettes somewhere would indicate I haven't made a 100% commitment and I need them there "just in case." That mindset, wouldn't have lead me to the 13 year quit I have now.
But as we all know, we're all different. And perhaps that will work for you. If it doesn't, I hope you'll re-visit this response.
I believe you ARE strong enough. It's hard for all of us. Take it as a challenge. An exciting challenge, rather than a defeatist attitude to begin with. Change your thinking from "I'm not strong enough" to I CAN DO THIS THING! Disrupt the negative thinking and push in the positive one. It's hard to change our thinking. I know. But we CAN. It just takes perseverance and stubbornness and a willingness to change.
I don't think we need to want to quit to overcome this addiction, but I do think we need to want SOMETHING more than smoking. It might be simply never having to go back to another day one. Or it might be the need to be the best that we can be.
What do you want more than smoking? Find that motivator that will ensure your quit. Sometimes we don't even know in the beginning, but we discover it along the journey. We need to ask and answer many questions about ourselves as we progress down this path. The strength we gain from that questioning is remarkable.
Don't give up.
Sigh...you are correct. I have only committed 90%. That's not enough! I have an anxiety attack when I think of getting rid of the smokes. WHY????!!!
Have you thought about shortening your goal? Thinking in terms of quitting FOREVER I found overwhelming. Perhaps that is part of the reason you have anxiety attacks over it. Can you quit for just a day? And if not, can you quit for half a day? I cannot tell you how just a little success at this will spur you on. Our quit houses are built brick by brick. Every time we get through a craving we add another brick.
Keep asking and answering questions for yourself. This is a good video to help understand the nature of this addiction. What is the Single Best Thing You Can Do to Quit Smoking? - YouTube
Something that helped me deal with cravings was thinking of this journey as a rite of passage. You just have to go through the unpleasant part. I accepted that it would be tough in the beginning. Kind of like if you are placed in a cast, or have gone through an operation. There's a time when you're simply going to be uncomfortable for a while. It's not the end of the world. It's a time when your body needs to heal and adjust. The difference is, when you're placed in a cast you have no choice but to remain in it. The option to do what you've always done is taken off the table. With quitting, the choice to smoke is still out there. It's the option to smoke that causes the panic. If you had no choice to smoke, if you were on a desert island and there simply were no cigarettes, you'd much more rapidly accept the fact that you can't smoke and get over the cravings faster too. Think about it.
You can do this quit believe it deep breaths little.mama and please destroy the cigarettes so they're not around if and when you get a horrid urge to relapse if they're not around then you've got the opportunity to give your head a shake and tell yourself that you don't smoke anymore you can be living a life of Freedom BUT first you must go through the roller coaster ups and downs so you can get to that good place in your quit where you realize how much better life is without the crutch of cigarettes believe it deep breaths and know that we're all here to help you in any way we can.....
What would make you strong enough for this? Think about it. Quitting is a personal decision--no one can get you there. I'm betting that you are able to decide to quit. Why? Quitting is doable and being accomplished everyday--there is no such thing as not being strong enough to quit. It's an addiction, so quitting can feel a little weird--but not impossible.
What you tell youself you can't do, you won't do.
Grr! Well said. I always told my kids "whether you think you can or can't, you're right " well, I am having a hard time following my own advice.
You can do this quit. Just tell yourself that you quit and do something else such as reading blog's drinking water, exercise, find a hobby ,ask questions on here . Just don't smoke you can do this .
Those are pre-quit jitters it's like your mental state of mind knows what you're gonna do and it's trying to block but you can do this we're here to support you with suggestions, tips, try drinking water, cinnamon Stix etc you can do it day by day DOF 89
How do you get through the first day!!! I'll take tomorrow when it gets here
You get through the first days the best that you can., sometimes an hour (or a minute) at a time. Take slow/deep breaths, sip from a bottle of water, take a walk, find things on the list of 100 things to do instead of smoke and do one, then another, then another. Do the recommended reading, take a shower, take a nap, call a friend, clean out a drawer, go for another walk, play a game on your phone, visit Etsy and dream what you might buy with the money you are saving. Then do it all again! You need to be disciplined in the early days to keep your mind off of smoking. We ALL had to get through the first days - and we somehow made it You can, too! My saving grace was Angry Birds. I played it almost nonstop for the first three days or so.
Just keep plugging away - I promise it WILL get easier - just take it a minute at a time.
Hang in there!
How are you doing this morning little.mama? It's definitely going to take time to relearn life without the smokes BUT you can and will be successful one precious Smokefree Day at a time or hour minute or even a second at a time believe it deep breaths and know that we're all here to help you in any way....
Hey, little.mama . You're doing SO well writing about your struggles. Use this to get thru cravings.
One mantra that really helped me through the first hours & days was "This craving will go away, whether I smoke or not". Its true, it will go away if you don't smoke. Find something to distract your mind in the mean time, coloring books, puzzles, doodling, walking around. Each individual craving WILL go away whether you smoke or not. But the only way that ALL of them will go away is if you do NOT smoke.
I like your Henry Ford quote "whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right" You have the power to make this happen .
You know who could really you with this is Dancingthrulife_6.4.13
You can and you will quit if you really want to. No smokes in the house the car the garage etc etc. you are stronger enough to quit. I was strong enough only waited way too long. But you can’t look back only forward. Please take all the great advice here. Please don’t smoke. You see I’m not strong enough now because of how sick I got from smoking. Please know you are strong enough to quit. Please don’t wait to get sick. We will help you. I will personally help you if you need me
Thank you! I am strong enough, but I keep having panic attacks! Help!
Did you experience panic attacks prior to quitting? I've only had one in my life an they're very scary. Try practicing some relaxation techniques--deep breathing, meditation (I watch Jason Stephenson on YouTube-he has a very calming voice. )
Get rid of those cigarettes - NOW! Put them under running water, smash them up and dump them in the trash. Keeping them around is giving yourself permission to fail....why ELSE would you need them?!
You are sooo right! I'm keeping a safety net and I know it! Grrrr!!!
How are you doing little.mama? I just wanted to check in with you and let you know that we're all here to help you in any way we can......
I gave up and am starting my quit again. Grrr! I hate this addiction!!!!!!!
Take the time you need, make your plan but do NOT keep cigarettes around once you make up your mind, it has to be NOPE, NMW Not One Puff Ever No Matter What! You CAN do this. You are not alone.
We are here for you stay close and read everything you can because there's a wealth of information right here on this site to strengthen your resolve to kick the nicotine poison to the curb permanently it's not easy by any stretch of the imagination BUT boy oh boy it's so worth it to be Free.....
little.mama How are you?
MarkEX Community Manager
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