I'm on day 131 today. First day out of no man's land. From what I have found so far, it's not waking up one day and feeling all better. I did get those kinds of feelings in the first few weeks, but once I was in no man's land it became one day and then another and then another. Each day has been a tiny bit better than the previous. I don't really think about smoking, rather I think about not smoking. I visit this site and the whyquit blog and read other people's stories and watch the videos and just keep reminding myself what I am doing and why I'm doing it. I've lost too many quits, many of them long term due to complacency or giving into junkie thinking. This time I have a plan to stay engaged for the long term in this group and whyquit and to support others in their quits. I realize that my journey is not something I can do successfully alone. I realize that taking this journey with others is the best thing I can do to maintain my quit. That and having a plan for dealing with my worst triggers. This time I'm going to stay quit because I know I won't just wake up from this and be cured. I need to invest in this quit. I need to protect my investment and make sure I don't lose it. I've worked to hard to get to where I am to throw it all away an then have to start all over again and potentially face life and death consequences. So, it does get better but it is inch by inch, day by day, week by week, month by month, and eventually year by year. It's a part of me, this quit, and it's something I have to live with and accept for the rest of my life. I'm learning to love it though.
