"What the hell is wrong with me that i cant socialize without smoking, like i think the whole experience will be that much deeper??? "
The only thing wrong with you is that you are addicted to nicotine which makes you think you want a cigarette. The reason you wanted one after a big meal is because you were going into withdrawal from the last cigarette. You want one when "socialize" because the stress of being a witty conversationalist causes nictone to be metabolized faster, putting you into withdrawal. Non-smokers and ex-smokers don't have these problems because it's the nicotine addcition that is causing the stress. That's what's so crazy. You want a cigarette to relieve the stress that smoking cigarettes is causing in the first place.
BTW, I've been to Philly. Saw Bob Dylan there for the first time in 1974, as a smoker, and recently, visited my daughter in college there -- for three years as a smoker and the last time as an ex-smoker. I went to Morimoto's and enjoyed the best meal of my life without a single thought of smoking. I didn't even want one when I walked out of the restaurant
