okay... not quite ready...

[leanna2]

so, yesterday at 3:00 p.m. i had gone twenty-four hours without nicotine (it was a personal goal of mine) i felt really proud about doing it, but i was so ready for a cigarette and i had one. i'm not ready to fight the urges by myself... and i feel really bad about not quitting like i planned, i feel like i let some members here down. but it hasn't got me down, i'm still working on my triggers, and i have went from smoking a pack a day to 5 or 6... in just a week! just gotta keep my head up.

[raychel]

It does not sounds like you are ready to quit.

If you wanted to quit, you would do it, plain and simple...not matter how hard it was. This quit I have no did not come easy to me... the first couple days were awful, but I realized it wasn't going to kill me. No one has ever died from quitting smoking, I am pretty sure. I put up with it b/c I wanted it that bad.

How can you say that physically you could not not have one? It is the addiction playing games with you. You have convinced yourself that you cannot quit... so I am not quite sure if you are ready to be here and actually try to quit until you accept the fact that you have control over this addiction.

It would be great if smoking less and less worked and one magical day you woke up and didn't want to do it anymore. Let me know how that works out, I would be interested knowing...seriously. B/c I have never met anybody who has had that work for them.

We want to help you out here , no doubt but you have a lot of work to do mentally to get in that place where you will successfully quit.

[brad3]

I know you're only 18 years old and you have time to think about and experiment with different ways to deal with quitting, but from a smoking perspective, I can tell you that you'll thank yourself for stopping right now. It's true. Ask anybody here. Come on, just do it - you're here on the forum, right... We got your back. What I'm gonna say here is just geared to help you...

Here's what you can do: Think of one of your girlfriends that you think is cool and that doesn't smoke. Just see how she acts without smoking. You'll want to, of course, not start anything else to replace smoking that could cause just as much trouble as smoking does. I'm sure you're a smart girl... But, back to what I'm saying.

My point is: Figure out what you would like yourself to be like if you had 5 million dollars - a massive beach house in Malibu, school taken care of, trips to scuba dive in Tahiti, whatever... Now imagine, in that visual of yourself, if you'd want yourself then to be still battling with this "I am trying to quit smoking" stuff. For you ( along with your plan ), that means that when it gets down to 0 cigarettes per day, THAT's IT. Give it up completely because when you go out with your buddies havin' fun and you're down to 1 per week, you may have another that makes it 2 per week, or even 3, then back up to 1 per day, then only 2 per day, etc. I'm saying, humans and ciggies don't work that way - by a few per week.

Just take my word for it, when you're 25 ( looking back ) and say, "I'm glad I didn't keep smoking like all of my friends did", you'll thank yourself! Now, relax, just think about it, and deliberately control it like you're doing. You're doing good by kicking it with us - you're helping us too, even!.. So, visualize! Dream big, baby. Cut your losses with the smokes. Define your life, and let it rip California-style.

[tara2]

I will take a different approach from others that have responded to this post (although everyone is right in their own way, there are alot of different perspectives). I can tell you that (even at 25!) it took almost 11 years of my fiance riding my ass to quit and now the addition of my 6 year old preaching the heatlh hazards to me. In the past two years, I have lost three people very close to me, two of which were heavy smokers and died of cancer. Even that didn't do it at the time, because I felt I still needed the smoke to deal with my stress and grief. I can tell you from experience that it is okay to do what you are doing by slowly weaning yourself off the smokes. If I can offer one bit of advice, though, and plan that decline in the number of smokes per day to zero on a quit date and get rid of them.

When I have tried the approach you are taking in the past, I found that on my bad days - as long as the smokes were around - I was having 7-8 instead of the 3-4 I was supposed to be down too. Of course, because it was okay for me to be smoking some, I would still tell my fiance and even start to believe myself that I was doing great. I have just learned from experience that there is no such thing as having even one stashed cigarette around when you are in the midst of a quit, because knowing it is there will get the best of you - and you will never succeed with this!

So, all in all, keep weaning while watching and learning your triggers. Sit down with a calendar and figure that in taking away so many per day or week, on what date will you be at zero? Make that your quit date and make sure you stick with it. The day before, clean out your car, house, etc. wherever you smoke. The night before, flush all your smokes, throw away all your ashtrays. Wash your hair and put on some nice scented lotion. Get the smell away from you and just make it happen! We are all here for you, and are proof that you can do it!

[banter]

From Joel Spitzer www.whyquit.com

Qutting by Gradual Withdrawal

Quitting by the gradual withdrawal method. I discuss this method quite extensively in my seminars. I always tell how if there is anyone attending who knows a smoker who they really despise they should actively encourage them to follow the gradual withdrawal "cut down" approach. They should call them up every day and tell them to just get rid of one cigarette. Meaning, if they usually smoke 40 a day, just smoke 39 on the first day of the attempt to quit. The next day they should be encouraged to smoke only 38 then 37 the next day and so on. Then the seminar participant should call these people every day to congratulate them and encourage them to continue. I must reemphasize, this should only be done to a smoker you really despise.

You see, most smokers will agree to this approach. It sounds so easy to just smoke one less each day. Thirty-nine cigarettes to a two pack a day smoker seems like nothing. The trick is to convince the person that you are only trying to help them. For the first week or two the one downside is you have to pretend to like the person and you have to talk to them every day. They won’t whine too bad either. When they are down to 30 from 40, they may start to complain a little. You really won’t be having fun yet. When the payoff comes is about three weeks into the scam. Now you've got them to less than half their normal amount. They are in moderate withdrawal all the time.

A month into the approach you’ve got them into pretty major withdrawal. But be persistent. Call them and tell them how great they are doing and how proud you are of them. When they are in their 35th to 39th day, you have pulled off a major coup. This poor person is in peak withdrawal, suffering miserably and having absolutely nothing to show for it. They are no closer to ending withdrawal than the day you started the process. They are in chronic withdrawal, not treating him or herself to one or two a day, but actually depriving him or herself of 35 to 40 per day.

If you want to go in for the kill, when you have them down to zero, tell them don’t worry if things get tough, just take a puff every once in a while. If you can get them to fall for this, taking one puff every third day, they will remain in withdrawal forever. Did I mention you really should despise this person to do this to them? It is probably the cruelest practical joke that you could ever pull on anyone. You will undercut their chance to quit, make them suffer immeasurably and likely they will at some point throw in the towel, return to smoking, have such fear of quitting because of what they went through cutting down, that they will continue to smoke until it kills them. Like I said, you better really despise this person.

Hopefully there is no one you despise that much to do this to them. I hope nobody despises themselves enough to do this to themselves. Quitting cold turkey may be hard but quitting by this withdrawal technique is virtually impossible. If you have a choice between hard and impossible, go for hard. You will have something to show at the end of a hard process, but nothing but misery at the end of an impossible approach. Quit cold and in 72 hours it eases up. Cut down and it will basically get progressively worse for weeks, months, or years if you let it.

I should mention, this is not a new technique. It has been around for decades. Talk to every long-term ex-smoker you know. Try to find one person who successfully used the cut down approach, gradually reducing to eventual zero over weeks or months. You will be hard pressed to find even one person who fits this bill. One other perspective that should help you see the flaw in the approach. Look at people here who had once quit for months or years and then relapsed. One day, after such a long time period, they take a drag and are smoking again. If one puff can do this after years or decades, guess what it will do after days or hours of being smoke free. It puts the smoker back to square one. All that any ex-smoker has to do to avoid relapse or chronic withdrawal is to - NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!

Joel

[leanna2]

It's not that I don't WANT to.. I just physically could not not have one. I'm weaning myself off of them much like you would wean a baby off of a bottle, do it less and less until finally one day I don't want it anymore... Cold turkey just isn't the way for me, unfortunately.

[julied]

You just have to decide to quit Leanna. You're not there yet.

How I wish I had quit at 18, I bet my skin would have fewer wrinkles and I bet I'd look 10 years younger. Oh and my voice, after smoking for over 30 years I have a bit of a raspy voice. That's something that really scared me into quitting now. I was starting to sound like a smoker. Oh the horror! I don't want to sound like a smoker when I talk.

I never cut down any cigarettes when I was preparing for quit day. I kept on smoking 30 a day of different bands. I just couldn't cut down. For me, smoking was all or nothing.

I smoked my last cigarette at around 1015 the night before my quit day and threw away the empty pack, the lighters and ashtray and said good bye forever to smoking.

Make the decision Leanna, stop smoking now, while you're young and you skin and voice haven't been affected by smoking for decades. There's no better time than right NOW.
On quit day

[debi8]

Today I'm celebrating my 2 week anniversery of being smoke free. I also wish I had quit when I was 18 but I didnt I loved to smoke. When I actually did throw away my cigarettes I didnt tell anyone because I really didnt have a whole lot of faith im myself after all I had been smoking for 36 years. Whenever I would think about quitting I would get a really sick feeling and just had to smoke a cigarette to make that feeling go away. I had been talking about quitting for about a month but I always seem to have a reason to keep on smoking. My friend told me about the commit lozenges so I tried those and they seem to be working for me. I can tell you the first couple of days were pure hell and triggers WOW I found out then that everything I did revolved around a cigarette. Its getting easier as each day passes. I found out that when you set your mind to it you will be able to get through it.

[freddysmama]

it's okay. we all have slipped. I am a week into this quit but I have slipped many times before. we just have to find that moment where it clicks and we throw them nasty sticks away. I hope it comes soon for you.

[raychel]

I spent a lot of time last night thinking about this post for some reason. I thought maybe i had initially responded too harshly, after all we are all here fighting the same battle.

I am only 23 (less than a month away form turning 24). I am still quite young and even I wish I would have stopped when I was 18... or stayed stopped when I was like 17... when I turned 18 and my addiction was finally 'legal' I think that is when it really got worse.

I realize how blessed I am to have to opportunity to stop now! To have the strength, the knowledge, the support, ect.

I will be honest...cigarette smoking negatively impacted my health from the age of 18 until now. You may not think it will happen, but it will. That is one of the things that finally got me into final quit mode... because I was like damn, look what it is doing to my health thus far... I simply could not envision how I would feel at 30 still smoking... let alone 40 or 50. I don't even think for sure that I would be here at 50 if I kept it up. And 50 ain't old.

Cutting down doesn't work b/c it makes you romanticize the cigarette...which tightens your addiction. Every cigarette becomes a precious break...a precious time out...a precious 'treat'.... realize that it tightens the reigns of addiction.