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Give and get support around quitting

stasiaski
Member

mixed emotions while quitting - feel so much better yet grieving the habit

Former vaper here (and very occasional, like once every few months, cigarette smoker). Sharing my feelings to help me stay motivated. I'm curious about your experiences emotionally in this process! 

My personal context if you're interested: I started as a very occasional social smoker at 18 and was that way for years. Slowly that crept into smoking tobacco mixed with weed every day for a few more years. That stopped and turned into vaping with friends, which turned into vaping alone waaaay more than I wanted to and feeling out of control with vaping nicotine. Couldn't go to a party or go out or socialize without it. I wouldn't smoke every day - but it was happening more and more and against my own will. I'd go a week or so sober, feel great, then cave to a situational craving and vape for several days very heavily and constantly. So it's very all or nothing with me.

Anyway. This whole vaping thing has gone on for two years, maybe even less, and I've attempted to quit probably at least several hundred times within that time. 6 days ago I got **bleep**ing fed up with my own cyclical behavior of wanting to quit, feeling better when not smoking, then giving in to cravings and feeling **bleep**. And since then I've had many moments of wanting to vape yet a bigger part of me was like...no. So it's like an internal tug of war. I'm excited that this time around seems really determined and steady, but a part of me wants to relapse for that first rush of nicotine. I'm enjoying the increase in focus, lighter lungs, and the increased free time on my hands. But a part of me feels grief at the idea that I may actually be done with the habit. Can anyone relate? Do these feelings pass? 

Labels (3)
14 Replies
YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

Those feelings definitely pass.  I didn't so  much grieve the loss when I quit, but many here have described the same feelings.  It makes sense, though.  That dopamine hit was with us when we were happy or sad , lonely, hungry, or celebratory.  Even after more than 10 years quit, I still will get a momentary "memory," and wish for that hit, usually as a  " reward" when I take a break.  Easy to dismiss, but there nonetheless!

Congratulations on your decision to quit vaping . It's common sense that anything you put in your lungs that isn't clean air can't be good for you! You will need to substitute “vape” or “device” as you do the reading I will recommend. Research suggests nicotine may be as addictive as heroin and cocaine. Because vaping is available to you most anywhere, anytime, I believe it might be more difficult from which to break free than regular tobacco products - but it CAN be done! There is a blog written by one of our success stories that you might find informative: I Quit Smoking and Vaping - EX Community . If you would like to use a quit aid and would like information on the various ones, let me know.

I recommend that you educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind To that end, I suggest Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.”, which can be purchased online or borrowed from your local library. Here is a video to inform you further about nicotine addiction : Nicotine and Your Brain.

The idea is to change up your routines so the vaping associations are reduced. Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from where you vaped. Maybe switch to tea for a bit. If you always had that first puff with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to vape so the view is different. Take a different route when you are out and about so you aren't driving by your vaping supply shop. Take the Daily Pledge each day, Just look for it on the home page. It helps to hold yourself accountable to your quit and the community..

You need to distract yourself through any craves. You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game. Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that vaping thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits. Get busy! Here is a list of things to do instead of vape if you need some fresh ideas:

101 Things to Do Instead of Smoke - EX Community

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want to vape" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?" Then DO it. You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

stasiaski
Member

Nancy, you are a goddess. Thank you SO much for replying with so much detail and compassion and encouragement. I'm looking at the resources now, and I'm going to screenshot your response so I can look at it quickly on my phone when I'm out.

10 years! Congrats to you and thanks again for your support. Will definitely be around on this community, it's so great. When I've had cravings I sometimes just scroll on this site to know I'm not alone and that it's possible to quit. I LOVE the question "what will I do for the three minutes while this craving happens?" I'm so motivated by that.

djbenton
Member

Awesome inspiration!!! Thank you for the suggestions and the links to ream more. 

Lindaaham
Member

Yes! I can relate.  I psychologically depended (on day 5, it feels like I should say I depend current tense) on cigarettes'.  They were there for me when lonely, upset, happy, board, celebratory, reward, how I took a break, everything .... so sad.  I too went through not smoking feeling better and go back.  Almost did yesterday.  Lets hand in there, we can do this. 

stasiaski
Member

Thank you for sharing. We can definitely do this. It feels so much better to lose the burden of that LITERAL toxic friend 

0 Kudos
maryfreecig
Member

Congratulations on quitting your addiction to nicotine. Give it time. And welcome to Ex, you are in good company here!!!

316218458_463466149244455_7344345187593041005_n.jpgScreenshot_20220917-090107.jpgIMG_7586.JPG

Above was one thing I did to remind myself of the cost of my addiction. This one was literal, but addiction costs in so many ways.

Barbscloud
Member

@stasiaski Welcome to the Ex and congrats on your quit.   We've smoked through every emotion and activity so it's normal to feel like something is missing in our lives when we quit.   It is an addiction to nicotin, and it's designed so that we need more about every hour.   

If you haven't done so already,  Educate yourself about nicotine addiction and create a quit plan.  Many have found success with knowledge and preparation.   It took me 50 years and many attempts to finally get it. I went into my quits blindly and was never successful.  In addiction to some aids, I found the Ex a week prior to my quit.  For the first time I learned how to quit and had the support that was always lacking.

This link is a great lace to start. Learn how to identify your triggers, the tools you'll use, creating new associations instead of smoking, etc. 

https://www.becomeanex.org/guides/?cid=footer_community_linktobex

Make the commitment and you can do this too.  We're here to support you on your journey.  So reach out anytime you need help, want to share your experience or to support fellow quitters. We're all in this together.

Start your day by taking the Daily Pledge.  It's a great way to stay on track on day at a time.

Stay busy and stay close.

Barb

stasiaski
Member

This was so encouraging Barb. Staying busy is a huge part of it, and hearing from someone who also took many many attempts is comforting. Sometimes I feel like I'll never break out of the cycle! I slipped after a week no smoking because I went out with friends. Maybe I need to remove the social triggers for a while. 

 

Onward! <33333

0 Kudos
Barbscloud
Member

@stasiaski  Good morning.  Some quitters do need to avoid certain situations and people early on.  You only need to do this one day at a time.   Don't think about forever right now.

Stay close.

Barb