wow, i'm so happy to know i was missed- thanks everybody for the messages and comments. i can say i haven't smoked- but believe me, the want to is definitely there. trying to get back into school and picking up a second job, and on top of all that i signed up to be an assistant leader with my sisters' girl scout troop. i'm about to be 19 on september 1st, i think i'm setting myself up for way more stress than i can handle. at this age, i should be with friends and going out and living the "best years of my life," but they suck.. i feel like an overworked mother (and i don't have any children of my own) but it's so hard doing my best and not feeling appreciated and respected. the best thing i've heard was two days ago when my best friend asked me to be her child's god mother, we had always said it would be that way- but you know how best friends go haha.. and i was kinda worried it was that way because she had the baby June 17 and it took her that long to ask me! i know this is a site for smoking- but it feels so good being able to just ramble on and having outsiders opinions and support. i cannot thank you guys (and ladies) enough! best wishes to all of you. i promise, i will definitely try to be on more- but the way i feel lately, i don't want to do anything but sleep all the time! i even ignore phone calls from the people who are closest to me because i don't feel like talking to them or don't want to be around anybody. i wish i could just snap my fingers and make it all go away. but i'm just gonna keep on fighting!
