Boredom and "relaxing" were my two worst triggers. Believe me when I say, I would go a week without smoking then the weekend would come I would blow it b/c I had too much time on my hands and had not re-learned how to navigate that extended period of time without smoking. Then I wouldn't smoke for another week and here came the weekend once again. I'd even make it to a Sunday sometimes but then I would "give in" and buy a pack. I'd smoke the whole thing in less than a day, feel like crap the following day and start the whole quit all over again.
BUT, just like you, I got back on the horse and kept riding. Each "slip" made it that much easier to tackle it the next time. Because, once I made the decision to quit, I was going to do whatever it took to make it happen. It's a process, so don't beat yourself up, just like anything else you set your mind to or decide on, you'll make it if you want it. And going through your own process makes you finally realize how truly easy it is quit and stay quit. We make it harder than it has to be, truly. Human nature is a funny animal! 🙂 Besides, you get on and off and on the horse again enough times and after a while you just want to ride and not get off anymore! In other words, you get sick and tired of being sick and tired of smoking and then not smoking, then smoking again.
Bored at work? Play solitaire on the computer. Go "window shopping" on-line at E-Bay or any place. Fill your time with something else, even if it means chewing on a coffee stir straw. Post here! 🙂 It's all about re-learning how to think differently about the minutes in your life and re-learn how to navigate them without the habit or act of lighting up as we become so accustomed to doing.
Same with the evenings and weekends. I finally had to get out of my house and just go do something else that I would not normally do just to prove to myself I could make it through a weekend without smoking. It finally worked. I broke down only once more on a weekend and by then I had realized that my triggers were not worth lighting up. The last thing I remember, I had a "come to Jesus" meeting in a mirror. Raged and roared at myself for being a junkie drug addict Mom and what a crappy role model I was for my son. From that day forward I have not smoked since.
Be persistent Diane. All this "stinkin' thinkin'" will go away. It's all temporary. You'll realize life happens whether we smoke or not. That it was the silliest thing in the world to think that you needed a cigarette for anything at all. That just like any major decision you make in life, quitting smoking being one of them, it will have its ups and downs, just like marriage, having a child, buying a car or a home. But like any major decision, we get through it all.
Congrats for getting back on the horse! Now keep going! Don't let the triggers rent space in your head! 🙂
