Where do I begin ??

[janice5]

Ok- I have a pack and a half .Usualy they wont last me thru the day .Iam a stay at home care taker for my husband & Grandaughter so I spend alot of time at my desk reading (smoking ). If not there then Iam running around trying to kill odors etc ..Blasting fans scrubbing wipeing all the brown off of everything .Yes I know -Smoke outside ..Of corse I do ! I smoke in the car when I get out of the car on the way into a store as soon as I get out ..During cooking and after a meal . My husband is on a cpap machine we were told yeterday the ramp cant go any higher (anyone understand that ??? ) Not that my intentions are to make it harder for him to breathe! I keep thinking -Wow I could afford to go Ice skating with mmy Grandaughter if i didnt buy smokes today ..I could save for the beach ..Then the next thing ya know Iam off to find my lighter ..Any Advise ???

[edith2]

We have an addiction that tells us we don't have one. You already have begun by coming to this site. It takes alot of courage to decide to quit. This website is a great support for you to quit smoking. You won't have to go through this alone. You can come to this site 24/7 and talk about what you're going through and the people here will answer and share their stories with you. You next step would be to check out the plan that this site offers by going to BecomeanEx.org and it will show you how to work the plan of the website. You will get alot of advise here and you can use what works for you. We're here for you. I am here for you.

[janice5]

Thank you . Ive been smoking since I was 12 (hate to say ..Now 33 years later Iam realizing its a addiction .
Growing up in a smoking /drinking household I guess I thought it was the normal thing to do ?
Not out to blame ~ but dont want to leave the same leagacy for my Grandkids . Time is too presious to let this addiction rob me of the simple joys in life like the "BIG ONE-- Breathing ".
I began cleaning out my car yesterday - planning on my reward to be some Air Freshners and non stick Gum .LOL . I have no Medical Coverage at the moment so patches and oral meds arent a option right now . I havent chosen a quit date yet - but I do want to make it as soon as possible . I have gotten myself down from 2 packs a day to one ..Have begun to reconize my Triggers ..(dealt with that with drinking but didnt realize it played a part in smoking as well ...Probably more so - the more I think of it !! How cunning this can be .But Ive reconized it for what it is so Iam praying thats the first step in the right direction . Wondering is it normal to have this weird grieving feeling - like what will I do with my time ? Brings that" friend" piece to mind because it does feel like Iam betraying something unseen by stopping . . No I have not lost a lug nut - simply a feeling .
Well my busy day is about to begin ..I will pop in and out ..Again Thankyou ... Janice