Try, Hope etc. by JWG

[marciem]

Another from JWG, the Invisible Man at QSMB.

John had two sayings that were very impactive to me, and I use them over and over.

1.  Don't put things in your mouth and light them on fire (i.e. "The Easy Way to Quit smoking" by JWG)

2.  "I didn't quit smoking to live longer, I quit to live better."  He said this often and well before he was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. 2 weeks before he passed he said to me:  "Regardless my outcome, quitting smoking is hands down the best thing I ever did."   ###

Newbies, take note!! Quitting is the best thing you will ever do for yourselves!!

Now, onto his homespun take on our Self Talk words:

Posted 06 September 2012 - 08:53 PM

"Try ,
A word not often encouraged to use when in the terms of quitting, there is no trying to quit. There is only doing. But in quitting are we not trying to better are selfs, perhaps trying to avoid a preventable death or disease caused by the effects of smoking. Are we not trying to live a better life. So in some ways
If it were not for “trying” we would never quit at all.
But when it comes down to quitting there can is no place for "trying'
To smoke or not to smoke is a choice, a yes or no decision.


Hope ,
Another word frowned upon in the pursuit to never smoke again and that is pretty much because , as pointed out above, to smoke or not to smoke, is a yes or no decision. You can-not hope to say "yes" or "no" because that is something 100% in your control. 'Hope' to win the lottery , hope it wont rain on a picnic or hope for you favorite team to win the big game.These are a few of the things you have no control.
Pointless it is for an inmate serving 20 years for armed robbery to hope for early release. But he could hope to live long enough to see it. A smoker on the other hand holds the key to his cell. So for them too there is no point in hoping, its only the matter of making the decision , yes or no , stay or leave.
But in life take away all you worldly possessions, your cars , your jewels and big screen TV's
what else do we have left but Hope. Are hopes are the comer stones ,that dreams are built upon

Luck
Is what you need in a game of chance and other things you have no control. So as smoking or to not smoke is a decision that you can control , there is no need or room for luck.
But Im sure there has been a person or two who has had something go wrong on there first day not smoking , the car would not start or some other catastrophe. I suppose these events could be blamed to bad luck, but are they reasons to smoke or just finding excuses to do so.
What of the person who quit smoking, never to have car troubles , no issues with the spouse , maybe even gets a raise at work has he then had good luck and now guaranteed to never smoke again?.
No.. and why ? Because smoking or to not smoke is a decision made separate from the events in our lifes we have no control over.
To say “good luck” is a nice gesture as long as the context dose not infer to there decsison to not smoke. But rather a short version , of I hope your car dose not break down , your wife doesn’t leave you or you get fired. Causing you more stress on a already stressful time in your life.

And what about the big word Quit.. yuk , what a negative word.
“ I quit”! you looser. Is all I can say to that . The funnest part about the word quit when it comes to no longer smoking , it is the least accurate word in all the dictionary. For when you “quit” smoking. For the first time in many years you have started doing something positive for your life , livelihood and well being .
Not to mention you have started to spend your time and your money more wisely , you have started to feel better about yourself.Re-learning to dream again of the things as a smoker you told your self you could not ever do..

Nicomonster 
That’s a funny word, think we were talking to a third grade class about not smoking . But the reason for the word - I believe is no one who works nine to five, has a nice house a family and spouse that loves them wants to be called an "Addict". So instead someone invented this cagey monster that whispers in our ears and tells us lies. " oh you won.. you can now just have a cigarette every now and then". " I promise its ok"
Like addiction there is no way to rid your body of this nicomonster the best we can ever do is to put him deep into a coma , but the laws of addiction now sway in our favor.
If we are never to smoke again this beast will never wake , leaving us to live are life’s unaffected by his presents sleeping deep with-in


Lastly I have saved the most dangerous word of all when it comes to sticking with this decision yes or no to ever smoke again, and that word would be “craving”
Most all who stop smoking throw that word around like confetti on at a Mexican wedding. Well craving means; to want or to long for.
I say, no one that has stopped smoking, wants to smoke , that’s impossible. No one wishes to win the lottery so they can go broke
What people suffer from after they stop from smoking is an urge or a reflex to smoke , a trained resonce to a situation. When you label these events as “craves” your mind then tells you you want to smoke. Thenyou start to dwell on you “want” to smoke , you start to feel as if you are depriving your self. Now you can’t shake this and in fact now it well could be you do infact want to smoke. BUT only in order to shut-up this Nicomonster.
If when this first started or even before thought for a min. “Ok when I get into the car, my instinct is to reach for a cig.”. So now what do you do , reinforce yourself “I do not want to smoke , driving my car is not a reason or excuses to smoke” in other words dismiss the urge before you even have it
Always smoked after a meal , make new rituals for this time , dishes , a walk, ect ,, be preparied for these urges there going to happen to everyone,,
Just whatever you do, Do not interpret them as a craving , a want or a desire to smoke a cigarette
For this gives the nicomonster the ability to use your own powers against you. And while you have support there is no denying this is a battle that can only be won by you alone
so it is imperative you remain in charge never to relinquish any of your powers to the apposing forces with in


To long didn’t read?
Best of luck quitting
Try real hard and never give up hope
Cravings are your friend


There that will teach um not to read my post , by god
It was only 3 pages"

[Giulia]

Wise man.  Wish I had known him.  Thanks for sharing.  Good stuff!