This sucks

[balazs]

I have been trying to quite since July. I was active on this site at the time and quit for a week cold turkey. I relapsed for about a month, and then quit for over a month. I was drunk and decided I could have a cigarette. One cigarette turned into one a day, one a day turned into 2 a day until eventually I got back where I started, digging around in ashtrays and finding cigarettes because I refuse to buy them. I don't know why I have uncontrollable urges to find cigarettes, but it is extremely shameful to me that I will resort to smoking nasty butts. It eats away at me because I feel like I have no commitment to myself and that very fact facilitates a vicious cycle in which I keep smoking. I don't even know where to start. I don't have money to buy medicine, my health insurance can't know that I smoke, and the people I live with constantly smoke. So... is there anything that someone can share that might help me out?

[edith2]

Thank you for your post Balazs. Welcome back. The last time I relapsed, it took me 30 years to quit again. You stated that you were drunk when you lit up a cigarette. This time I'd suggest refraining from alcohol until you're more secure in your quit. Did you notice that you didn't have to "catch up" when you started up again? Smoking is a progressive addiction and you just picked up where you left off. The other thing is since you've been to this site, you can no longer enjoy smoking like you once did. Now you know better and this knowledge is something you can't scrape off your shoe, so to speak. Check with your local agencies; some states have programs that will help you out with stop-smoking aides. So as far as the people you live with, set your boundaries. Tell them that you are trying to quit again and that you'd appreciate that they smoke outside. If this isn't possible, just do the best you can to stay away from it. Don't allow smoking in your room. Get back with the program and try a different angle this time. Now you know what your triggers are and what not to do. Don't do the same thing expecting different results. We really need you here because you have a strong message. Take your negative situation with smoking and make it a positive one to work for you and to help others. Success doesn't always happen on the first try. It took me 35 years and four tries to get it right. I will be here for you and help you in every way I can.

[edith2]

Thank you for your post Balazs. Welcome back. The last time I relapsed, it took me 30 years to quit again. You stated that you were drunk when you lit up a cigarette. This time I'd suggest refraining from alcohol until you're more secure in your quit. Did you notice that you didn't have to "catch up" when you started up again? Smoking is a progressive addiction and you just picked up where you left off. The other thing is since you've been to this site, you can no longer enjoy smoking like you once did. Now you know better and this knowledge is something you can't scrape off your shoe, so to speak. Check with your local agencies; some states have programs that will help you out with stop-smoking aides. So as far as the people you live with, set your boundaries. Tell them that you are trying to quit again and that you'd appreciate that they smoke outside. If this isn't possible, just do the best you can to stay away from it. Don't allow smoking in your room. Get back with the program and try a different angle this time. Now you know what your triggers are and what not to do. Don't do the same thing expecting different results. We really need you here because you have a strong message. Take your negative situation with smoking and make it a positive one to work for you and to help others. Success doesn't always happen on the first try. It took me 35 years and four tries to get it right. I will be here for you and help you in every way I can.

[dian]

Sounds like you just need to take the steps to quit again. I quit like maybe 50 times before. This time I'm hoping it takes. I stay away from smokers and places where there are cigarettes. It's been almost 6 months for me now. Try again.

[jennie3]

Every state offers free patches and some offer gum too try 1-800-QUIT-NOW hope this helps a lil

[jennie3]

Every state offers free patches and some offer gum too try 1-800-QUIT-NOW hope this helps a lil