Recent relapse put my life in shambles

[jacktheman0123]

I quit last summer and then recently relapsed.  I was stressed and the temptation hit me like a truck and I went out and bought a vape.  I am dating this girl.  I didn’t tell her I was ashamed and scared.  I stopped and then told her about my relapse…. Right before we left for break and I won’t see her for 3 weeks.  So now we are going through things over text.  The odds that we stay together are low.  I want to quit no matter what but if we break up.  It will break me and I worry about it.

[Finallyquittin]

With little context here, I’m just reaching out to say we’re here for you. Relapse can happen so easily, but we pick ourselves back up. It’s good you’re writing about it and documenting your journey. You can look back on this as you move to get back to nicotine free.  In my experience, vaping doesn’t help with stress. It can actually made it worse- the vaping would make my heart race and I’d fear getting low or running out of pods added to the stress. I believe in you! You are able and capable are getting back on track. 

[champsin97]

Yeah it can happen.  Just throw it away and keep on going.  Maybe you lose a girl maybe not but your health is much more important.

[biscuit9]

Your quit and your health and wellbeing come FIRST.  With or without this girl, vaping will not change one thing about the relationship.  Vaping changes nothing, but it does affect your health.  No one is worth putting your health at risk and I hope you understand that.  

[CommunityAdmin]

I'm sorry to hear you're having a tough time, @jacktheman0123 . It's totally possible to get back on track. Here are some site resources that might help with that:

https://www.becomeanex.org/ex-resources/about-quitting/stay-quit/how-to-recover-from-a-slip-or-relap...

https://www.becomeanex.org/ex-resources/about-quitting/manage-stress/

Remember, we're here to support you!

- Danielle, EX Team

[Barbscloud]

@jacktheman0123 Make you quit your number one priority. Your quit is for you, no one else. Get right back on track and don't let years pass you by like I've always done

Relationships can be a real trigger to smoke again.   Part of quitting is learning how to cope in new ways.   If you haven't done so already, educate yourself about nicotine addiction and put a plan in place to deal with stressors.  This link has some great information to help with your quit.

https://www.becomeanex.org/guides/?cid=footer_community_linktobex

"If you view your lapse as a mistake and as a product of external triggers, rather than as a personal failure, research shows that you will have a much better chance of returning to abstinence quickly. Your lapse becomes a tool to move forward and to strengthen your motivation to change, your identification of triggers and urge-controlling techniques, your rational coping skills, and the lifestyle changes needed to lead a more balanced life."

Join many of us on the Daily Pledge to stay on track one day at a time.  We're here for you so believe in yourself that you can do this.

Stay busy and stay close.

Barb

[ReallyReal]

Hello @jacktheman0123 glad you posted here.  You wrote that you want to quit no matter what--that is a great attitude to have.  Smoking and vaping are self-destructive behaviors and we continue in those behaviors because we are addicted to the nicotine.  Smoking and vaping do not in truth benefit us in any way though our addict brains tell us we need the nicotine to de-stress--but that is all lies.  You relapsed but you are choosing to get back on the road to freedom, that is great.  Make a choice to be good to yourself, to take of your health and your life, even when things are rough.  Quitting is FOR you, even when it seems others are not.  I am learning that when I am feeling hurt by the actions of others, the best possible thing I can do is maintain my quit, which is me being good to myself and my body.  That's what quitting is, a choice you make to give yourself a better life.  You can do this for yourself.  Choose health and freedom.