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Give and get support around quitting

Danni84
Member

I slipped today.

I slipped today. After 7 days, I couldn’t fight the urge any longer today, all I wanted to do was drink some beers and smoke! How can I control this? I did so good all week, but I talked myself into it and there was no way of changing my mind. 

How can I talk myself back into being a good girl and say NO??

22 Replies
JACKIE1-25-15
Member

Sorry that you did not stay smoke-free.  It isn't a fight.  It is the willingness to let it go and do whatever is necessary not to smoke, no matter what is happening in your life.  NOPE not one puff ever.  Quitting smoking requires you to educate yourself to relearn behavior and your thinking to do the work in order not to smoke.  We call it changin your stinkin thinkin .  Along with support, it is doable. If you don't read the suggested material your chances of failure increase. You may have to bookend your days here to read, study, research to stay on track.  I suggest you start over immediately. Alcohol can play a major part in a relapse.  You should consider limiting alcohol until your quit gets stronger. How to Quit Smoking for Good 

Barbscloud
Member

There's lots of support, and lots of information, and lots of preparation to do, and lots of lots, but in the end it's your journey.   I agree with trying again immediately.  Unfortunately, when people relapse from addictions, it often turns into years before we try again.  It's just too easy to put it out of minds till later.  I'm of the belief it does no good to beat yourself up and no one is here to judge, just to support.  Did you enjoy those few cigarettes?  Probably.   But you also probably feel like you failed yourself.  So just look at it as a test run and give it another try.  This isn't easy!

67DOF

Kimshine
Member

Yep, you talked yourself into smoking but just talk yourself right back out of it. Good advice above. Quitting isn't easy! I cannot take the risk of drinking early in my quit before I have a good strong foothold on the quit. Right now is much to soon for you to try to navigate drinking alcohol and remaining smoke free. Back in the saddle, my friend. I recommend you do much reading here!

Kim

karenjones
Member

You didn't talk yourself into smoking, the addict in you talked and you listened.  Remember Pinocchino , you were pinnocchin..  Why not just drop the conversation, refuse to engage with your addict about conversations about how nice it would be to have a cigarette. ;You know that smoking makes you depressed.  That addict in you tries to twist your arm to have a cigarette and if you listen you lose your quit and you know how difficult the first 3 days are.  Don't listen to the addict. Now start over again and walk towards a life free of addiction. You can do it.     Karen 63 DoF

bonniebee
Member

Makes me wonder it you also have another problem ??? Beer and withdrawal from nicotine not a good combo ! Sorry you had a relapse keep trying and stay away from the alcohol .

elvan
Member

In my opinion, your biggest mistake was FIGHTING the craves all week...this is NOT a fight, it is  journey.  I would also very strongly recommend giving up alcohol for several months, but that is ME...I did not have a beer for six months and when I did, I FELT my commitment slipping and that was when I had not finished my second beer.  Alcohol is a quit killer.  You CAN do this but you have to remember that it is a journey, one step at a time and that it WILL get easier, if you LET it.  I am quoting YoungAtHeart‌'s welcome below.  Let me add my OWN welcome to EX.

Ellen

Nancy is currently in the hospital recovering from a broken hip...this is HER usual welcome to newcomers:

Welcome to our community!

 

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it online or at your local library.

 

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance.

 

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

 

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

 

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

 

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

 

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

 

Nancy

I too used alcohol and smoking to relax and actually a reward for finishing a job well done.  In my case, I knew I had to give up drinking for at least 3 months to keep my quit.  Quitting was the most important thing to me.  I just wanted to be done with it.  Hop right back on that quitting train and put your thinking cap on and think of ways you can relax instead of drinking.  Every week, treat yourself to something sweet or buy yourself a little something for a reward for a job well done.  I can tell you that the reason you smoked has a lot to do with alcohol.  We think of them as hand in hand skipping down the street together.  Alcohol lowers our reserve, our fight is weakened.  I hope you decide to give up drinking for at least a few months until you have some days not smoking under your belt.  if you are doing this cold turkey, you might want to try the patch.  Cold turkey was just too much for me.

Now, I don't know if you went through the steps outlined under the My Quit Plan.  If you didn't, please make a point to do so.  Make it an extra effort to pay attention to the section of beat tobacco cravings.  This site only works if you work the site

Danni84
Member

Thank y’all so much for your support! I am not giving up. And, now I do know what to do next time I let my addict get too far gone where I won’t listen to my common sense. Wish me luck!

JACKIE1-25-15
Member

Luck has nothing to do with it.  It requires work, commitment, determination not to give up no matter what is happening in your life.