I need help

[Barb102]

It’s day 45. I have been trying to encourage those newer to the quit than I am But now everything is going wrong like I’m being tested. Don’t know if I’m really strong enough any more. Yesterday and today I really can’t handle it   Everyone things I’m fine I should be over this. But it’s coming on hard. I’m crying and depressed and I really miss smoking even though it gave me COPD. But just a few right now seems to hard to pass up. Please help me. I’ve read everything it’s just not working. Only you kind elders understand and I ask for your help. I re-read NML it’s not helping. I know if I go out and just have one who am I kidding 5 I just don’t care Everything is going wrong in my life and I’m sorry but I really miss my evil one. I need help   Please help me 

Barb

[Sandi4]

Hi Barb - I’m not an elder but when I saw your pledge I came looking to see if you blogged and you did! That means you want to protect your quit. I’m so proud of you for coming here first.

NML is no joke. We think we’re ok but then BAM, the surprise crave. It’s ok. It’s normal. Ride it out.  Get up and move. Don’t sit still and dwell on it. If you can, do some jumping jacks, take a walk, clean a closet, sweep the garage.  Read some more. Just do something until the crave passes.

Don’t go back to day one. You’ve come too far! We’ve got your back. Stay close.

Sandi

[Barb102]

Thank you Sandy. I really thought I had this. It’s 2 days now and I just feel so awful and scared and craving like it’s Day 3. 

[Sandi4]

Barb....Tell me about WHY you want to quit. I read that you have one health issues and a promise you made to your husband. List those reasons for me.

I’m quitting to live a long healthy life so I can see my only child grow up and become the wonderful woman I know she’s destined to be. She’s only 14 now. She’ll be 15 in. June. I can write about her all day. She’s my WHY. Tell me yours.

[Sandi4]

Sorry. I meant some health issues.

[Barb102]

My granddaughter in our pix. She love me so much as I love her. But she’s young she’ll forget me if I’m not around as will everyone else in time. I’m tired 

[Barb102]

I have COPD with empazema. I still wheeze. I’m still out of breath helping my husband that just came home from surgery. So what’s the difference if I smoke and wheeze. I try so hard to help everyone but right now I feel everything I do is wrong. The world would be better without me. 

[Barb102]

I’m just in the way. Dealing with cravings that after 44 days no one wants to hear anymore

[Sandi4]

We want to about them! That’s the purpose of this platform. To help each other. I’m at 70 days and had a crave that started because I was on the phone with a friend who smokes. Not sure it was a crave but more of a memory.  I’m 54 and smoked for 40 years with the exception of a couple of quits.

When you’ve smoked as long as we did, it will take some time to move beyond all those memories. You’ve been reading here so you know that. 

Smoking right now now won’t change anything you’re going through.  YoU’ve made it so far. Keep going.

[Sandi4]

She’s so beautiful Barb! So worth the flight. It may not feel like it right now but I know you want to be there to see her milestones. Fight to make memories she’ll remember.