You really struck a chord when you said, "waiting for them to go to bed so you could smoke." I do the same thing, which is more shameful than the smoking itself! I quit for a long time before I even tried to get pregnant, then with each child somewhere around their toddlerhood it snuck up on me again. Sort of a coping mechanism to keep all the plates spinning, I guess, that's what I tell myself. Then if someone gets out of bed and comes looking for me, I'm kinda standoffish hoping they won't smell anything. Sneak through a back door into my bathroom for a "cleaning routine". In one way I'm protecting them from 2nd hand smoke, bad example, etc. in another way I'm not as good of a parent as I could be because of all the hiding, HORRIBLE! And how will I explain a smoking related illness to them someday, they would fell pretty hurt I would think. I smoke 4 to 5 cigs a day, I'm getting ready for the big day.
