Greetings fellow EXers,
I’m sure most of you don’t know me but there was a time when I spent a lot of time here for you see like so many of us, I was an addict. I was in a nutshell, my own worst enemy simply because I was so focused on my addiction that I couldn’t see through the cloud of smoke that I was creating. I couldn’t find a way around my addiction.
Thankfully, I eventually saw through the smoke screen of my own creation and realized that this cannot stand! I had to find a way out of this mess that I’d created for myself. A way to a new life that at the time I wasn’t even sure I wanted. The mere thought of quitting terrified me to the very core of my being for you see, it was the core of my being where my addiction lived. And I have to tell you, this addiction had sent out tentacles. It had found a way into every part of my being. In essence, I had become a slave to my addiction.
I realized that I was out of control, reaching the point of chain smoking my way through my day and the reason I never thought about fighting for my freedom was very simple. Every time I thought about quitting smoking, I felt an irrational fear. This made no sense to me and eventually I realized that the only way out was to understand what I’d done to myself. Because with understanding comes the ability to see change.
Change was indeed what I was fearing. When I thought about every aspect of my day, the cigarette was always there, or if it wasn’t then the planning that was needed to get to my next cigarette was there instead. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that this insanity was just plain wrong.
And I also knew that I couldn’t do this alone. What I needed was knowledge and a little help from others that had been where I was because for me, addiction was a monster that had a huge grip on me. I’d tried to quit before without success and because of this I even feared trying again.
And so I studied addiction and I learned how my addiction interacted with me. And the more I looked inward, the more I understood how the tentacles of addiction had wrapped themselves around every aspect of my life. Once I learned that, I had to figure out how to pull those tentacles out of me, one by one until I could find peace.
I mention all of this as a kind of greeting because I want you to understand that I understand what you’re going through from personal experience. And I also understand that there is an amazing peace on the other side of addition. That we can win this seemingly impossible battle with ourselves if we can just start seeing the future without the cigarette in it.
I also know that this takes time and that we don’t always succeed the first time, or the second but what matters most is that we always learn from every mistake that we make along the way.
So wherever you are on this journey, I first want to congratulate you for seeing through the shroud of addiction and realizing that this is a journey of life. A journey for the future, and that right now, the choices you make today will determine what that future will look like. You’ve already taken that first step and found a way to overcome the fear of change.
I hope to be around more and get to know you all a little better because I understand your pain but also love seeing the results of your labor because in the end, there’s an incredible new world out there. One free of slavery. One where we can live life in a whole new way. I’m living that life now and know from experience that everything I had to go through was worth it!
ONWARD TO FREEDOM!!!
Chuck
