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Give and get support around quitting

Gwenivere
Member

Fed Up

EI II’m on my 4th day of 7mg. patches with lozenges as craving back up.  I know there is no way around withdrawl, but I was back up to what I smoked adding in the patch.  I did some research about cutting them but a better solution was suggested to just peel half the backing off and adhere it with tape.  Use the covered half tomorrow.  Going to see if this relieves some of the mind fog, fatigue and weakness I have been feeling.  Since stating the patch I’m a walking , grouchy zombie.  It does help with craves.  

I’m as much bothered by the physical as I am the psychological.  Extra sensitive today being alone and missing a close support person.  No place to go expect out to grab a burger for once was a special day of warmth and family.  I also notice my chest hurts now.  Not the heart attack kind, but uncomfortable and I didn’t expect that.  It’s listed for cold and gradual.  So I don’t want to debate that issue.  Some experience it, some don’t.  

I’m just frustrated today this was a forced quit at the hardest time of year.  Just needed to vent.  Want to curl up in my jammies and go to sleep.  Almost 4pm already getting very dark with rain.  I wish I had a good motivation for doing this.

17 Replies
Gwenivere
Member

I have a magnet that says....

Succes. Is a journey not a destination.

Right bow this applies to me as I am vulnerable to failing.  The addict still lives in me tight now, even tho they don’t appeal. But at a mere 5 days I could because I could fail quite easily.  I understand the feeedom many feel, but right now I.am vulnerable.  So right now it is a jloerney and time will tell if I can view the saying changes.

YoungAtHeart
Member

BELIEVE that failure is not an option and it will be so---really!

0 Kudos
Gwenivere
Member

I don’t know why, but I see replies in my email, but not here.  Anyway,

Ellen?  You ride a stationary bike for 10 miles and lift weights?  Wow!  I can hardly handle going around the yard for poop patrol and then to the mailbox.  Bronchiectasis has a big hold on me.  Even before it did I could only do the bike for about 4 miles.  Treadmill too.  My back took away a lot of things too so I’ve grown weaker.  

You do this 5 days a week?  I am super impressed!

Sandy-9-17-17
Member

I am told the more exercise you do after you quit for good, helps strengthen the lungs!  Believe me, the tough times will come and go, just as if you were smoking.  The difference now is you are no longer self harming through the tough times by smoking!   

I thought I was going to do NRT, but thought better of it, and am so glad I chose not to.  I would rather fight through the cravings and urges than continue to be a slave to nicotine!  You are in a good place here, and everyone will offer you up their help, support, and what helped them.  Glad you're here!   

Gwenivere
Member

Thanks Sandy.  Unfortunately my lungs are permanently damaged and will never heal.  Bronchiectasis is non reversible.  The best I can do I slow down the progression.  But yes, it’s nice not to have cigs be the center of the universe.  

Gwenivere
Member

Oh, and bronchiectasis is not caused by smoking.  But smoking sure doesn’t help.  I’m told. I may have had it for years before it was diagnosed and I was very active.  

virgomama
Member

You do have a good motivation for this Gwenivere.  It's YOU.  You are worth this.  It WILL get better. Time is what you need.  Pain and soul searching are part of our journey. With or without smoking.  Pain and soul searching are part of life's journey.

indingrl
Member

you are worth quitting and living to BREATHE FREE-FYI-MY story-i was venting-just like you and jojo from new york saved ME from MYSELF-i wanted to use MY DRUG NICOTINE REAL BAD-i came and vented-she said to ME-she had stage 4 lung cancer-she said to put a plastic bag over MY head and smoke-thats what using NICOTINE gave her -SLOWLY SUFFOCATING STAGE 4 LUNG CANCER-I get to choose-die or live-smoking causes LUNG CANCER-I chose not to use over ME-that was 7 years ago-i still come to VENT! Fyi-God blessed jojo from new york with a double lung transplant-and another woman- God healed her from stage 4 lung cancer-kelly-i think was her name-she had a blog about dying from using drug nicotine-BOTH DID-now they BOTH out living and BREATHING FREE!  CONGRATS AND GOOD JOB CHOOSING YOU ARE WORTH IT! thank you so much for venting and HELPING ALL of US to stay quit-TOGETHER-N.O.P.E.-NOT ONE PUFF EVER! AMEN!