Depressed from quitting - need help

[NewsteadMtn]

Long, long time smoker (45+ years), quit last April due to non-COVID pneumonia. Fell off the wagon in September, quit again Oct. 20 and not a puff since. 

The "reason" I went back to smoking in September is what is threatening to do me in again now - I am depressed all the time. I avoid my triggers which means I have become a hermit - I never smoked in the house, only outside or in my car, so I avoid going anywhere or even outside. I can't stay in my house forever! I talked to my doctor and was told to focus on health, etc. Hard to do when I have yet to feel any better from stopping. Help! 

[maryfreecig]

Welcome to Ex. Many of us here at Ex were long time smokers and we know how hard it can be to see beyond the addiction. Our attachment to smoking really is an outcome of drug addiction and it can be tough seeing beyond the attachment. Not impossible though!!! And you've already done a lot of the grunt work. Now that you've found a community of quitters you can come to and express your frustration and your ups and downs, you can also start to get out more. Quitting is a one day at a time project, and it is important to appreciate all that you have done to quit. Congratulations on your quit--even if you feel awful right now, you've done a lot of work to stay smoke free. Now it's time to change your thinking on smoking--Ex is a great place to get support and ideas on that. There really is life after smoking. Nine and a third years ago when I quit, I didn't think so. I thought I loved smoking and that smoking did something for me...that kind of thinking is all addiction. 

So, around here we like to see change as a one step, one day at a time. I hope you feel supported by being here. Keep reading, blog when you want to and comment on other blogs if you feel like doing that. 

When I quit there was no way that I was going to feel better by focusing on my health--I missed my smoking life, so I had to do other things whether I felt good about them or not. It takes time to relearn life. And it is hard to believe that we have to relearn life...don't we know how already? No, smoking was a part of everything--keep working on doing other things--make a list, get brave go outside. Keep working on changing your perspective on quitting.

[Barbscloud]

@NewsteadMtn  Welcome to the Ex and congrats on your commitment to quit even the with challenges it has caused.  My quit was very emotional as opposed to physical and it took me a good while to feel better.  Many quitters experience mood changes when they quit  and these are some things that might help with that:

• Exercise. Being physically active can help. Start small and build up over time. This can be hard to do when you’re depressed. But your efforts will pay off.
• Structure your day. Make a plan to stay busy. Get out of the house if you can.
• Be with other people. Many people who are depressed are cut off from other people. Being in touch or talking with others every day can help your mood.
• Reward yourself. Do things you enjoy. Even small things add up and help you feel better.

But  after 3 months of quitting and your depression is preventing you from leaving your house, it may be good idea to seek some professional help. I would recommend speaking to a doctor for help. If your current doctor can't help you, maybe you should find someone else.  

Hang on to your quit.  We're here to support you, so reach out anytime we can help.

Barb

[biscuit9 · Accepted solution]

Smoking was never your "friend".  Genuine friends that care about us, do not hurt us.  Nicotine hurt you, it is not your friend, nor mine.  I quit in Sept of '22, quit day 137.  So, your Oct. quit is fairly close to mine and you are to be commended for not smoking!  In spite of how you feel, you are doing the right thing, for your health.  Your doctor said focus on your health.  Do you still remember how you felt when you had pneumonia?  The coughing, the phlegm, the weakness and tiredness, the chest hurt, painful to walk across a room, extreme fatigue.....That sounds pretty depressing and you don't want that.  My prayer for you is that you can begin to enjoy the fact that you are nicotine free and not smoking.  Your lungs are healthier and I know you feel  better about yourself.  Go outside and breathe in some FRESH air, not smoky air, you have earned it.  I do understand about triggers, but you have faced down the monster, at least inside your home.  Is there someone who would walk with you, so you might feel braver.  I posted on here, about meeting up a couple weeks ago with girlfriends who I had always smoked with, but I didn't go outside with them cos I didn't want to be tempted but then I felt like I was missing out.  Came back on here and posted how disappointed I was in myself and I thought I was stronger than that.  I can't keep this up, I am going to have to sit with smokers, but I really don't want to, but I'm going to have to live life, right?  I'm determined to change my attitude, because I have accomplished an amazing feat and I need to be proud of that and if I'm truly committed, I should go sit with them, just like normal.  The reality is, they all want to quit too.  Please don't smoke, you have come so far and nicotine will not solve a single problem.

[NewsteadMtn]

Thank you all for the support, ideas and care. I will definitely try some of these! 

[Beccalynnwagers]

I feel the same way. Talk to your dr. about adding a vitamin D supplement to your diet, it helps with anxiety and depression. 

[Barbscloud]

@Beccalynnwagers Welcome to the Ex.  Thanks for sharing.   Congrats on your success.

Barb

[Beccalynnwagers]

Thank you I appreciate your kindness, please don't think I'm ignoring you. I'm having trouble navigating the website. 

[Barbscloud]

@Beccalynnwagers if you need to know something specific, let me know and I'll try to help you.

Hope you're doing well.

Barb