On Day 8- still struggling

[Linn2331]

Day 8. STILL having issues. Feel like crying. I have read easy way and others. Done and do meditation, prayer, yoga etc. I WANTED to quit and have for a long time. So what is wrong with me to still feel cravings in my head after 8 days? HELP! So tempted to go back. Angry, sad, at a loss!

[elvan]

vol876‌ your comment on Linn2331‌ was spot on. I smoked to deal with feelings, l didn’t quit before l developed smoking related illnesses. I have been free for almost 7 years now but l have COPD, emphysema & l am now on oxygen 24/7. That was always one of my biggest fears, needing oxygen all the time. I had accepted using it at night but all the time is just awful. I don’t go anywhere except to the doctor because of the pandemic but l have to deal with the looks & the questions...”You smoked”, “do you STILL smoke?” I am always embarrassed, l beat myself up enough, l don’t need to feel like a bigger fool. It’s an addiction...medical staff know very little about addiction, take it from a retired RN. I am so sorry that l EVER smoked, let alone for 47 years. When your feelings threaten your quit, take it one feeling at a time. No crave ever killed anyone but no one can say that about smoking. You are BOTH doing really well! NOPE, Not One Puff Ever, NMW, No Matter What.

Ellen

[Rachy2283]

Everything everyone above just said.  Congrats on making it to heck week!! I am almost there.  Some days are more challenging than others but keep reading posting and I too LOVE this place.  One day at a time.. NotOnePuffEver is also my mantra and telling myself I am a nonsmoker everytime I think of smoking, as I do my new non smoking activities(walking, drinking water, breathing, etc.) Has really helped.  I laugh everytime I say "drinking my water because I'm a NON SMOKER NOW!!" It has brought a little humor and even joy into my quit journey.  Hang in there and congrats on making it 8 days!! Woo hoo!!

[Linn2331]

Hey Rachy2283, day 10 for me now and started out great but let negative people get to me. Ugh. I LOVE it here too! I am so GLAD for you! I had to post today because I felt like caving but came here first and saw these. You ARE there. WE are there! we just have to keep fighting off the negatives. Old habits die hard is true! But we can do this! Woohoo to you and congrats x 10!!!

[elvan]

I am not sure if you just hit reply to someone’s post that they get a notification of that. If you LIKE or mark a post as HELPFUL, the person gets a notification. It may include more than one person’s positive response. If you want to be sure that your comment gets to the person, l THINK you have to @ mention them. Click the @ button & start typing their user name, you should get a drop down selection so you can choose the correct name. If you wrote the original blog, l am really not sure if you get a notification of a comment Linn2331‌ I am @ mentioning you here so you will get a notice, at least l hope you will. You replied to vol876‌ but did not @ mention him or her so l am doing it here, if that makes ANY sense.

l am pretty sure you want vol876‌ to get your comment. Let’s see if this works.

Ellen

[Linn2331]

Elvan, yes! I do not even see vol876 comment?? My pine do not highlight? I hope no one thinks I am ignoring them. If I do not answer, I didn’t see it? Thanks so much for all of your help!

[elvan]

Linn2331‌ l saw your comment & went back to find the post. You are doing GREAT, no one is going to think otherwise. Keep going!

Ellen

[Linn2331]

Elvan thank you so very much! Thank you vols876! I hope you saw my reply! 

[Linn2331]

Apparently it said I replied. I will get the hang of this. I am so sorry that you are going through all of that. My med chart said Emphysema and COPD, but when I asked my doctor about it he said it just meant I could get it. But my results said it. My lung scan was allegedly clear but I have smoked for 40 years since I was 14. I quit a few brief times. So I am feeling overwhelmed I smoked that long and didn’t even realize it. I hiked, biked, played tennis, went rappelling, you name it. I started getting too tired about five years ago. 

[Troutnut1]

Its kind of tough on us when we realize what addiction has done to our beautiful lungs. I had a similar history culminating in 3.5 packs a day. So I don’t know why it surprised me when a CT scan came back with “severe emphysema” November before last. I felt like it was a death sentence. I followed up with a pulmonary function test which shows I have about 59% of expected capacity for my age. He called my disease “moderate”. BUT, I quit smoking 20 years ago and got pretty active again as a result. 20+ years ago I couldn’t get up the stairs to my loft. But now I downhill ski (40-50 mph) several times a week and workout daily. So we can expand our lung capacity greatly, even once copd has set in. My trainer says she can expand my capacity 30%. Which might explain why I set the track record on the 6 minute walk test as part of my pulmonary function test. I went 300 meters in 6 minutes without a drop in my oxygen levels. My ski buddy will turn 81 this March and he was a heavy smoker too. He quit 25 years ago and has had emphysema for 21 years. And he’s one of the fastest skiers on our mountain. So there is great hope. You may avoid it altogether if you quit now. My pulmonologist says only about 25% of smokers get it. My suggestion is quit smoking, get active, eat healthy, maintain a proper weight, and continue to monitor your lungs for cancer, copd. etc. We live in miraculous times, My doctor said they are now doing lung transplants on people like me up to 75 years of age. Of course they would expect a long history of abstinence and healthy lifestyle before they would give me new lungs. And maybe I won’t even need them. 

[Rachy2283]

Thats AMAZING!! Your posts are always very helpful. Thanks for sharing Troutnut.  That certainly gives me hope to get back to better health