Support - Giving and Receiving

[Dr_Hurt]

Using tobacco can become integral to the way we relate to others. A person might smoke to be connected with others in happiness, or smoke to be alone after a disagreement with a loved one. Smoking can be an easy way to make acquaintances with others who have stepped outside to have a cigarette or it can feel helpful in managing loneliness or boredom. While you are smoking, it can sometimes be hard to imagine being a social being without smoking.

But, in some ways smoking may distract us from deeper relations with others. Stopping smoking can provide an opportunity to connect with others in a new meaningful way.

We frequently see a good example of this at our residential treatment program at the Mayo Clinic. The residential treatment program is an 8-day live in program designed to help people from smoking. It consists of a full schedule of education. counseling, and medical supervision that truly helps people who have 'tried everything' to stop. One of the most powerful things in the program is how the patients support one another.

It is always impressive to see how patients in the program share with each other, accept help form one another, and grow stronger together in stopping smoking. Patients become acquainted, grow familiar, laugh together, sometimes cry together, and all with a smoke. Sometimes life-long friendships are forged. The genuine and smoke-free emotions are palpable. People learn that they can have fun, step away and be alone, communicate directly, have emotions, and be more fully involved in the give and take of social living without smoking - check out EX Community to share and receive.


Dr. Richard D. Hurt is an internationally recognized expert on tobacco dependence. A native of Murray, Kentucky, he joined Mayo Clinic in 1976 and is now a Professor of Medicine at its College of Medicine. In 1988, he founded the Mayo Clinic Nicotine Dependence Center and since then its staff has treated over 33,000 patients for tobacco dependence. Send your questions directly to Dr. Hurt at AskTheExpert@becomeanex.org

[jan__tx]

oh wow I wished I lived closer - I still have days even after 192 days:) but from what I hear you will always have that want and have to just deal with it

[edith2]

I couldn't agree with you more, Dr. Hurt. I smoked for over 30 years and never felt comfortable around my family because they don't smoke and all I could think of was ways to get outside or away to have a cigarette. Last week my sister came up to Washington state to visit her sons, and she took me out to lunch. It was the first time I'd seen her since 2001. I gave her a big hug when I saw her, and didn't worry about stinking like a smoker. Actually I can't remember the last time I hugged her. For the most part, the visit was very relaxing, and not once was thinking about getting out of the restaurant to have a smoke. I was able to sit there and enjoy the conversation and her company. I never talked to my family about my smoking, but now I can talk about it openly and they are all proud of me for quitting. I can't put a price on how good I felt visiting with my sister as a non-smoker.

[stephanie-cortes]

I'm a smoker of 16 years. I started at a very young age. I think I am ready to quit. I'm just so scared I'm going to miss it. But I hate the way everything on me smells and the way I feel. I depend on cigarettes for everything. I HATE IT! I know it's not going to be easy and I'm looking for some kind of help and support to get me through it.