Hi all. Reading some of your posts and can see the desperation of some of you to quit - and I relate to it all too well. I am very lucky. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in June, had a double mastectomy, and thankfully, my OncoType DX test came back telling me I don't need chemo as my recurrence rate is very low. BUT - smoking. My surgeons told me over and over again, that I must quite before the surgery I had (I didn't), and keep asking me now if I have quit. I am tired of lying to them and telling myself as soon as 'things' get back to normal, I'll quit. If I don't do it RIGHT NOW, I NEVER WILL. I know from the past. I quite when I was in my mid 20s. Had my son in my mid 30s and went back to it 3 months after he was born. I found the biggest help back then was to use the patch, and also to replace smoking with excercie and changed my eating habbits.
This time I want it to be the last time I quit. I have quit for 3 days, the patch I am now allergic to, so I am sucking on these Nicorette Lozenges (I hate gum). They are helping A LOG. My doctor also gave me a prescription for Xanax to get me through the first 2 - 3 weeks which really are the hardest. I remember someone telling me years ago when I quit that she had quit too. She was much further along than I was. She told me this: "I took it in 3's. I knew it was a huge milestone to make it a 3 days and I went out and treated myself to a massage. Then 3 months. I bought myself a new dress and shoes. Then by the time 3 years came, I didn't even realize it had been 3 years. If you can make it 3 months, then you've made it. It only gets easier. And I found then she was RIGHT on the mark. It does leave you - this longing to have a cigarette. It is getting through not just the first few days or weeks, it is getting through the first few months.
Believe me - I have made a million and one excuses to keep smoking - to even return to it after I had my son and was so lonely (my husband was always traveling for work), everyone I knew worked, and here I was at home with a cholicy screaming baby. I felt so sorry for myself, I went and sabatoged what I had completed so successfully by going back to something I no longer was addicted to. I felt the addiction come back with the first drag of that first cigarette.
Right now I am on DAY 3 of quitting, yet it feels like FOREVER to me and yes, I am longing to have a cigarette so badly. But - I'll go and lie in bed, suck on one of these lozenges for awhile, and maybe do something I enjoy like work on my jewelry which I design. The cravings pass. It is getting through them and knowing that eventually they will become so infrequent if not completely disappear.
My son is 15. I want to be here to see him graduate HS. To meet his first girlfriend. To see what kind of man he becomes. I want to be here because life is truly beautiful. I love my life and I know that it can get tedious at times, nervewracking, challenging, etc ... but my perspective must remain positive. If I keep up that positive perspective, I know I can do this and so can YOU!
