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(Note: this piece was first published in a blog by @aztec back in 2012 called Craving - EX Community The original author april_ac was from another site. Thank you Aztec for bringing it here!)
We interupt todays broadcast..for a test! (TRY THIS!)
Ok...especially you newbies...I want you to REALLY try this.
Don't give me that "AWWW Man!!" It's not a hard test!! More of an "exercise"!
I want you to stop what you are doing right now....and look around the room. Look at everything. Take your time. (Don't read any further until you do that.)
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Now...I want you to look around the room AGAIN...and this time find all of the things that are RED. FOCUS on the things that are RED. REALLY look at them! (Don't read any further until you do that.)
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This time....look around and find all of the things that are BLUE. Again...FOCUS on only the stuff that is Blue. REALLY look at them! (Don't read any further until you do that.)
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Now....look around the room ONE more time. (Don't read any further until you do that.)
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Did the things that were Red and BLUE stand out to you the most?? Probably! Know why? Because THAT is what you were FOCUSING on!
Do ya see where I'm going with this??
WHATEVER you focus on the MOST....is what will be stronger...stand out more....become MORE dominate. JUST LIKE CRAVINGS!! If you FOCUS for too long on the craving...it GETS STRONGER.
So...SHIFT your focus AWAY from the craving!
What do you mean you can't do that....that it's too hard??? You just DID IT in that little mental exercise a minute ago!!! How much were you focusing on smoking while you were looking around the room...focusing on the Red and Blue stuff?? Probably not much...if at ALL!
It DOES work.
While I don't crave cigarettes anymore...I do have other areas of my life where I use that exercise. Sometimes it's needed to RE-focus on the GOOD things I have...when I'm feeling down. It gets my mind AWAY from the "pity party" state.
Make this work for you. It's your quit....It's your life.
And it's worth fighting for!
Thanks for playing along!! You may now go back to your regularly scheduled programs!
what if one of your red items happened to be a box of Marlboro's.
Sorry I was being a wise-@**
But I actually do love that exercise.
I literally did have a box of Marlboros around but I tried not to focus on that, lol. I signed up for this program about 5 minutes ago and that excersize was really helpful, it’s a good tool to have! I couldn’t resist replying to your comment as it was perfectly timed when I saw it. Lol! Thank you Giulia!
Kamella, Do you still have your box of Reds? If so, soak them and dump them in the garbage can! I soaked 2 packs yesterday morning since I made an impromptu decision to quit.
We don't need those anymore!
Oh no. Emptied the pack yesterday and threw it away.
Ok, great, just checking
Well, in answer to your question Michelleko1107 (and we love wise @sses here) #1, if you have quit, and you've listened to the advice given here, that red box of Marlboro's has been removed from your premises and sight. (Unless you live with another smoker. And that's a whole 'nother story! lol) But, OK, I'll go with your premise. Suppose there IS a red box of Marlboros in you 'red' line of vision. And suppose you DO focus on it. Don't forget what was written as part of the above exercise:
Did the things that were Red and BLUE stand out to you the most?? Probably! Know why? Because THAT is what you were FOCUSING on! WHATEVER you focus on the MOST....is what will be stronger...stand out more....become MORE dominate. JUST LIKE CRAVINGS!! If you FOCUS for too long on the craving...it GETS STRONGER. So...SHIFT your focus AWAY from the craving!
You know if that red object is so fascinating to you (that Marlboro box) and you want it NOT to be, then part of your quitting homework is to figure out a way to make it LESS fascinating. And the first step is to become aware of WHY it's so fascinating. Because when you understand the WHY, you can begin to understand the HOW to combat it.
I know you were joking with your response, but it's really a great point you've made. But then the whole point of the blog is to not only become aware of what you focus on but then CHANGE your focus so you don't become totally myopic.
Welcome to the site! Keep posting. You make good points!
Interesting exercise!
It IS, isn't it?!
In Uta Hagen's acting class in NY, one of the techniques we practiced was to focus on a particular mundane object in our home and spend a lot of time thinking about it, making up a story about it (if it had no personal reference already imbued.) Giving it a life so to speak. After spending several hours doing that, this mundane object grew in stature in our mind. What we focus on will grow from a molehill to a mountain or from a mountain to a molehill. If we focus on smoking and cravings they will enlarge in our mind. If we re-focus on something else ANYTHING else, they will shrink. The more we pay attention to something, the greater that something will become. So we must be careful of those things we give power to by our attention.
Giulia Brilliant, seriously, brilliant!
This post is good in every way. Not only the quitting aspect, but the pity party aspect. Thank you for posting it.