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Give and get support around quitting

Kkay
Member

Newbie (36 days)!!!

Hi all. I do not post a lot BUT do read on the site most everyday. I take away good info. And leave the rest if it doesn't really fit for me. There was a conversation why the Newbies don't stick around. In my short experience, I have found that posting early in the morning is nearly impossible with my schedule. I am a nurse and work at 6 a.m. Those early times are when most activity happens. I normally get on at 9pm MT. If I do respond to a post it gets mixed in the shuffle. It is no ones fault, I still benefit. : ) Thanks!

Next, there are not enough newbies ( someone in my spot at that very point in time). I love the knowledge of elders but other newbies are needed so that I can help them and help myself at the same time. Really, what help can I give to an elder? 

Lastly, no offense intended, (just being honest) sometimes there are elders that are rough on newbies and they act as if they are licensed experts in the field. If you want people to come for support it needs to be supportive and not punitive. Not every person is going through their quit exactly as you did. Big props to those that have quit for so long, BUT I think this might be the issue. This is a small amount of the time, but it could send someone packing or worse smoking...

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11 Replies
YoungAtHeart
Member

Your input is valuable to us.  Thank you for sharing it.

Nancy

(and congrats on 36 days!)

Kkay
Member

Thank you!

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Giulia
Member

Nice  going on the 36 Days!  And glad you piped up.  Not everyone gives nor receives support in the same way.  It's a very delicate balance.  For me, I must speak my truth as I know it based upon my own experience.  Anything else would be regurgitating someone else's in their same manner.  And although I tend to be rather blunt, I try not to be unkind.  Truths are not judgments.   But people can mistakenly take them as such.  You're wise to take what works for you and leave what doesn't.  We say that often on the site.  Some people prefer direct language and it impacts them in a way that helps, others don't.  The beauty of this community is that all types of different support is available here.

there are not enough newbies ( someone in my spot at that very point in time). I love the knowledge of elders but other newbies are needed so that I can help them and help myself at the same time. Really, what help can I give to an elder

Great point!  I think we're all hoping that this new platform will attract more newbies to the community.  And you're absolutely dead on - support is a two-way street.  By helping someone else, we reinforce our own positive thinking.  But I'll tell you what help you give to elders - you remind us of the beginning stages of this journey.  That's a necessary part of our quit maintenance - staying connected emotionally to what it's like, lest we forget.  You help to keep our quits alive.  And some newbies have insights we've never considered.  And we too learn from YOU.

Hope you post more often.  You have a lot to offer here that needs to be heard.

Kkay
Member

Thanks Giulia. I will try, on my days off and when it is not so late at night!

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Giulia
Member

@Kkay  Good!

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JACKIE1-25-15
Member

Hi Kay, Congrats on 36 days.  I am glad you took the opportunity to blog.  Thanks for opening another window.  "Newbie 
Quitters."  Must be a new page. 

Kkay
Member

Hi Jackie. That was an existing group that was my only choice to post in. I have been trying to learn the new layout. I barely got used to the other one! Thanks : )

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elvan
Member

Congratulations on 36 days, I understand the difficulty in finding responses, PLEASE know that your journey is just as important and someone who has been on one for years...you take us back to where we started and you help us to help you which makes everyone stronger.  We rely on each other on this site and every single person here is an individual fighting an addiction, it doesn't matter if you are new, it matters that you read blogs, comment when you can, and "take what you like and leave the rest."  You are in a unique position to help us elders get used to a new format and you can make suggestions as to how we can best help you.  I am a retired RN who worked ER and ICU...had to stop because of severe RA and I miss it every day of my life.  It WAS my life.

I am really proud of you for taking this step and taking care of yourself.  It took me a very long time and resulted in a lot of damage.

Welcome,

Ellen

Kkay
Member

Thank you Ellen! I look forward to talking more to you as we share the same background. 

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