It has to come from you.
I was asked if I would quit to influence my friends brother. He actually tried to get me to commit right there on the spot. He knew if I did, I would follow through. I'm like you. I don't like to be cornered into doing anything I have not spent some time thinking about.
When he saw he couldn't FORCE ME to say yes, he softened his tone and asked me if I would consider it.
Did I ignore the request and let it go? NO
I really considered it and I figured out a way to test myself for the challenge.
I never told him what I was doing and he never asked, or, if he did I probably told him I was thinking about it.
What I was doing was so powerful, and SO SIMPLE!
I was just telling myself to "wait a little longer" when I thought of smoking.
Don't read anything painful or tortuous into that because there was none of either.
What do you think happened by my telling myself to wait a little longer.
I smoked less. (Isn't that what you expected?) :-)
If you delay smoking when you think of it with a simple phrase. "I'm just going to wait a little longer." (sounds a bit like "I don't do that anymore," doesn't it?")
there is No pressure, No pain and you are smoking less. YOU DON'T EVEN NEED TO SET A DATE UNTIL YOU ARE READY!
After 4 weeks I was smoking 5 a day (down from 20) and the only ways I knew were because I wasn't going to the store as much and, I actually had money in my wallet. I was now thinking and I was off automatic pilot with smoking.
The Friday of the fourth week I went to the corner store, which by now was the only place I could find my brand. I had not planned anything unusual but, as I pulled the money out of my wallet and put it on the counter I knew it was my last pack. I told the store owner I was done.
His mouth dropped.
I lived in the neighborhood for two more years and never went to that store again.
I never craved a cigarette in those 4 weeks because, I smoked whenever I wanted.
The next Monday was New Years Day so I decided to quit on Tuesday. No broken resolutions for me.
It took me 4 weeks but I had proven to myself I didn't have to smoke because I thought I did.
I think all the counting becomes frustration, all the planning and setting a date would have been counterproductive for me. All you are focusing on is smoking and trying to figure out something you have no idea how you will react to until you do it. I was learning and with absolutely no misgivings or doubt.
I feel there is no smoker who could not quit in this way. The only variable is the time it takes each person. You don't have to take 4 weeks, you could take 6, or 3.
However you do it, it has to come from you.