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Give and get support around quitting

manofsteele
Member

So, you want just that one cig, huh?

A reprint from another site...

I have been quit for 5 Months, 4 Days, 1 hour, 20 minutes and 8 seconds (155 days). I have saved $697.75 by not smoking 4,651 cigarettes. I have saved 2 Weeks, 2 Days, 3 hours and 35 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 1/17/2005

Those were my wifes stats had she not fallen. Why did she lose her quit.....it really doesn't matter. Could it have been avoided? Who knows. I posted the following for a good friend of mine earlier today and felt that everyone should read it. Here goes:

Picture yourself a second or two after you stub out that quit-breaking cigarette. The one that you just had to have because the craving was so strong you couldn't hold out any longer, when that voice inside you was saying.. "Go on, life sucks, you may as well smoke a cig.. y'know for your nerves.." or the other one.. "you've got this beat now.. you are in control.. you can have one just now and again.. go on have one for old time's sake.." So you bum a cigarette, and smoke it and in 2 and 1/2 minutes, you stub it out.

Now what. Your mouth feels like crap. Your lungs are tightening up. You managed to stifle the coughs .. but barely. You began to squint again because the smoke hurt your eyes. and your fingers and clothes smell again. You either want to throw up, grab some mouthwash, take a shower, or have another.. maybe buy a pack.

But then you realize what you've just done. After all those times when you said you were going to quit, and then when you finally did, and your family and friends were so happy for you - but not exactly over the moon, because after all they've been hopeful before only to see you relapse - all that enthusiasm is now smashed to pieces on the floor. And all the pressure that drove you to grab that cigarette in the first place - it's all still there. Nothing has changed, except now you've added one more problem: you just blew it.

And then you realize what you've really done. You had invested days, maybe weeks and months, in this quit. You had made a great decision, one of the few things you really and truly felt proud of in your life, and you just blew it. You just blew the quit that you swore to yourself was the last one. You were so positive, so motivated, and encouraged, you were really on top of it, ahead of the game for once, you had taken control of your life and it felt like a whole new beginning.. and you just blew it.

You look at that stub in the ashtray. The grey ash and the brown edge to the burnt paper, and the tar stain on the end of filter. You remember the thousands of cigarettes you have stubbed out and think about the tar that came into your lungs as smoke. And you think if smoking that one cigarette was worth it. Nothing's better. You feel a little dizzy now as the nicotine hits your body, even a little nauseous - certainly don't feel the pleasure that you remember the adverts and billboards were promoting during your early years as a smoker. In fact it's hard to remember any time when you felt that pleasure.. just another tobacco company lie.. They helped you to become an addict the first time, but when you smoked that cigarette after you quit.. well that was a whole new decision. You made that one all by yourself - there's no pointing fingers now, you know that cigarettes kill, so when you lit that one cigarette, the choice to smoke was all yours - no-one else to blame. And you just blew it.

It wasn't worth it.. time after time the slippers' and relapsers' lament how they feel like crap, how ashamed they are, how they have lost confidence and hope, how they hate themselves, how much it hurts, how depressed and they cry and hide and cry some more. And now you are one of them.. the quit losers. Lost in the wilderness, not quite a smoker.. yet and not sure you are a quitter, searching for some dignity, some self-respect out of this. All because of that one cigarette. Because you blew it.

OK, time to come back.. thankfully this was a "Picture yourself..." so none of this really happened. You didn't smoke that cigarette, and your quit is intact. You take a deep breath and you can still fill your lungs without breaking down into a hacking cough. You can smile, because you are still in control. The craving passes and you can shake your head a little and give yourself a little pat on the back at your success. You remained true the promise you made to yourself on day one. Because none of this really happened.

Did it ?

Author Unknown
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5 Replies
manofsteele
Member

Peggy is 100% right in my books. I am an addict and one puff and I would be back to a 2 +pack a day habit.
N.O.P.E = Not One Puff Ever ...............so for your all or nothing code.....hopefully you will make the right choice....
or maybe One Puff = Wrinkle ,,,and every puff after that makes wrinkles more pronounced ...... not too far from truth
raychel
Member

This can be very true and is a good read but I also wish to say to those who really invest in their quits but then do have "just one"... I just hope they don't think they are completely screwed and are destined to keep smoking. A slip (I don't like that word slip... a slip IMO is something accidental, I think smoking a cig is very intentional) does not have to become a full blown relapse.

Telling ex smokers that one is never the answer is great, because so many who have just one do relapse, but I think it is also important to not shun those who do mess up and lead them to believe that they are hopeless. I am not advocating "just one" by any means... but if you have screwed up, don't give up hope and think you're destined to become a smoker forever again....its just not true.
mark_g
Member

thats awesome, congrats (even tho thats way overdue lol)...any advice for me? I have been on the patch and it has really been working, but every now and again I get those stupid, annoying cravings that makes a part of mind say "Ya know, this is all pointless, you have tried to quit before and to no avail, why try now?" I crack myself up with these thoughts haha.

I have been quit for 3 Days, 4 hours, 1 minute and 17 seconds (3 days). I have saved $6.32 by not smoking 31 cigarettes. I have saved 2 hours and 35 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 6/20/2008 4:30 PM

Thanks!
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manofsteele
Member

I am glad this post is still helping people ... I really like finding ways to help and everyone learns differntly......

ps - Peggy is pretty cool...I have been very fortunate to know her for a while and seeing her grow in her smoke free journey
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debbie-bishop
Member

ManofSteel you are my hero! This is my two week mark. I quit 6-26. I've quit so many times before and this post is my story. I always hated to see the disappointment in my family's face most of all but I could not help myself. This quit I know more about what I am facing and I am fighting with all I have.

Moochie
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