I am making a big mess of relationship

[Julie1960]

He is going above and beyond to help me.  All I do is bitch and complain.  What is the matter with me.  He is going to give up on us.  I need help

[Swanbird]

What is going on???

[Julie1960]

Just me being hateful and cussing and fussing about little things.  Just because I can't handle life right now and I take it out on him.  I no God it's wrong I don't mean to but it happened.  I have really hurt him

[green1611]

Something due to quitting smoking, in an anxiety, possible.

Try to be clam and steady. Situation will improve.

[sweetplt]

You are so early in your quit, I don’t suggest this normally, but Julie since you have been struggling so much with your emotions...how about talking to someone ... a therapist, or your family Doctor, just to learn where to place them...ie., I know I go to the gym and work out hard, and get my aggression out...you seem to need an outlet, but seem to need some one to help you find that outlet other than your partner... Also, another thought does the local hospital have a Quit smoking support group...perhaps you can talk to others and get some ideas what they do with their emotions.  Honestly, I don’t want you to worry about losing your relationship on top of quitting...You need to find a way to get it out...~ I am so sorry ... this is my best advice right now...but still thinking...~ Colleen 402 DOF 

[Swanbird]

I am there with you.  I just had a big fight with my husband.  I am more sensitive, more emotional, more everything right now.  Nobody can really understand what we are going through except us.  Hang in there if they love us it'll be okay.  It's just going to take some time for all of us to get through our new lives.  It's an adjustment for all of us.

[YoungAtHeart]

Perhaps you might talk to your doctor about a  Rx for something like Welbutrin to help take the edge off?

Hard to help if I don't know what you have tried?  Are you exercising?  Meditating?  Singing/dancing to some music?  These all might help alleviate the stress caused by quitting.

(btw - he is actually not being supportive if you have told him what is involved in quitting and he is still taking your grumpies personally.  Explain to him that it has nothing to do with HIM!!!)

This phase IS going to end  - you just have to get through it!

Hang in there!

Nancy

[maryfreecig]

Does he have to go above and beyond? Does he feel he has to? Can't he just be normal around you. After all, there is very little he can really do to help you feel better. That is your job and it takes time. Bottom line please don't make this a choice between a relationship or quitting. Both are doable.

It is OK to complain about quitting here at Ex. You do not have to wear a smiley face. You can say what you need to say about how you feel about quitting. Exers are good at listening. It is OK to feel mad and angry about it all. 

[Barbscloud]

I have to agree with Swanbird‌   This can be a very difficult and emotional time for many quitters.  

 Hang in there if they love us it'll be okay. 

It is a new way of life and ending an addiction of any kind can be difficult on those close to us.   It's a major change for us and therefore for those we love.  Is he feeling the way you feel?  Women can be so much more sensitive than men.    Trust that it will be ok.

Hugs

Barb

[Swanbird]

How are you now Julie?