I am sorry that this post is not going to be very positive, but I need help BAD. I’m at 9 weeks, 3 days. The first 30 days were honestly a breeze compared to what the last 30 days or so have been. I haven’t had a cig, not even a puff. I’m very proud of myself and I want to quit, but I keep having thoughts that will not escape my head. I want to smoke so bad some times and I try to take my mind off of it, but then I get frustrated thinking “so I’ve distracted myself. Big deal. I still want one.”
I don’t like the place I’m in right now bc I feel super angry. I know I did this to myself, but I keep thinking it isn’t fair that I have no self control. I make the mistake of comparing myself to some of my friends who can have one cig here and there. Meanwhile if I have even one, I’ll be back to a pack a day in No time. I do not want to be a smoker. And I don’t want to be angry or Where I’m at. I don’t know what has happened, but I want to know it will get better. I started crying the other night bc I wanted one so bad. It makes me feel weak and like a slave to my addiction.
what is clear is that this is a very addictive, powerful, manipulative drug. I am clearly over the physical addiction, but that piece of crap keeps trying to bring me back. I know I’m not the only one who has gone through this feeling, so if anyone could share some tips or advice on proper coping mechanisms, I would really appreciate it.
I’m sorry to be a downer. I want this quit to be for life and I’m scared the cigarettes may win.
also, does anyone know how to up the ex community texts? They decreased in frequency and I’m someone who likes a constant reminder.
Thank you. Happy holidays and STAY SMOKE FREE!!