Yes, it's been 10 years since I smoked a cigarette. Amazing from someone who thought they LOVED smoking and could never quit. I remember my last cigarette - it was after the first time I commuted home from work (about an hour) without smoking a cigarette. Smoking in the car was my heaven - I relished the fact that I could smoke in a judgement free, safe and comfortable place. Not smoking on that drive was a HUGE accomplishment and it empowered me. I got home and had dinner and ultimately went into the garage to smoke my last cigarette before bed. That last cigarette was a maintenance cigarette - one I was convinced that I needed before bed. It tasted nasty and I was consciously aware of the lingering smell on my breath. I got up the next morning and postponed my usual morning cigarette for 5 minutes. Five minutes came and went and I was encouraged by the fact that I was able to postpone, so I postponed another 5 minutes. That's how I quit - in 5 minute increments the first day. 5 minutes became 10, 10 became 15 and before I knew it (obsessively thinking about smoking the entire time) I had my first smoke free day. Unlike others, I could never imagine a life without smoking. I could only imagine not smoking for a few minutes at a time. I kept a pack of cigarettes in the house but asked my husband to hide them from me. I could not commit to never smoking and I could never set a quit date, but I could commit to not smoking for a few minutes. For me, quitting smoking was a process - not an event. I had slowly weaned smoking about 1.5 packs a day down to about 5 cigarettes a day (with the help of long term use of Chantix). Each time I postponed, I learned more about my addiction and gained new insight and tools. I used those tools on my first smoke free day and relied on them for the first few months.
In the last 10 years, I lost both of my parents and my sister died unexpectedly. The company I had worked with for 10 years shuttered their doors without notice and I lost my job. I could have used any of these events as an excuse to start smoking again, but somehow I kept plodding through. The first smoke free week was a miserable experience and I knew that I would have to go through it again if I picked up a cigarette.
I wish everyone here the best of luck. I smoked for 31 years before I finally quit. I don't miss the cough, the smell on my clothes, the social stigma, the obsession, worrying about what I was doing to my lungs and the absolutely insane expense. I am a very grateful ex-smoker.
