I am trying...but is it hard enough?

[mdkrn2001]

Day 43 of my quit and I continue to crave them all the time. I am on Chantix and quit 1 week after starting them. I continue to find myself thinking that I should just start smoking again and thinking “I am so tired and exhausted of fighting the urges”.  I am not here looking for sympathy, HOWEVER, I am also not here to be talked down to again, or made to feel like a bother. I am just confused with all of my thoughts running through my head. Smoking has been my crutch since I was a teenager and have smoked for almost 35 years. Yes it sucks, and yes I knew it would suck during my quit. But I honestly thought it would be much easier this late in my quit. I knew there would be bad days but really? I understand I am in No Mans Land also, but that doesn’t really do anything for me. I need to mentally get past this desire to smoke. This is indeed the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I know by smoking, I would be so disappointed in myself as well as knowing that I don’t want to have to try to quit again. This is so miserable. I have tried alternative thinking, meditation, exercise, and lots of Food! UGhhhhhhh!!! Just needing to vent I reckon, I dunno.......... I apparently am not trying hard enough. I am at a loss......I know I must beat this, but do I really wAnt to?  And is this simply the Addiction talking.....so frustrating

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Congratulations on 43 days. Venting is good.   I am sorry if you feel you will get bashed by airing out your EXperience with quitting.  That is why we call it Support. I can only tell you the truth. It will get better if you hold on and not smoke no matter what.  If you think that is bashing please forgive me.  Let's look at this logically.  How long did you smoke?   Years maybe.  You told yourself about 30 times a day that you needed a cigarette for X number of years.  It takes time for those thoughts to diminish.  When? No one has the answer for anyone else.  We can only speculate.  For me, it was about 60 days and it got better.  The 83 day was the best.  When I truly realized that I was a nonsmoker.  My ah-ha moment brought a smile to my face because I had been telling myself that for 83 days.  I finally believed it.  The rest has been history. 1702 days ago.   The idea is to reprogram those thoughts with self-talk.  Just because you think of something does not mean you have to do it. Right?  https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2018/06/05/to-smoke-or-not-to-smoke  Another thing, remember I am not bashing I am just giving you some truth.  You say you are fighting.  Have you tried not fighting? /blogs/jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007-blog/2018/10/18/you-are-fighting-until-you-are-willing?sr=search&... to Relax, embrace the quit. Breathe think of every crave as riding a wave. Do not tense up.  https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2016/01/21/i-tried-everything  Enough said.  I hope I helped.  Hang around, participate.  Sharing your Experience can help someone else and you.  Thanks for listening. 

[marciem]

43 days is terrific, and seriously you haven't fought this hard and come this far only to get this far!  

I completely understand the exhaustion from fighting so hard, and I've seen posts here and elsewhere about not fighting it but going with it.... like when you're on the beach in front of the surf, those waves can knock you over until you're exhausted and go back to the comfort zone of the sandy beach (smoking).  Or... you can dive under that oncoming wave, get beyond it, quit fighting and just float.  It takes bravery and a certain mindset to dive in there, but the effort is more than worth the challenge.

You are still early in your quit.  I thought cigarettes/smoking/not smoking/something-about-smoking related stuff  24/7 for at least six to eight weeks, then a time came when I could say... "Hey, I haven't thought about those things for ... x minutes!!" .  Golden hours, then days, are right around the corner for you, and it WILL get easier!  

Patience.  Patience.  Patience and mindset. You're doing so well, keep on doing it!!  Do try to change your mind a little, when those craves hit think of how awful the smell is, how terrible your hands/hair clothing smell afterward, your mouth tastes disgusting, call those things to mind and realize that that is all smoking will hold for you at this point... the physical addiction is pretty much asleep by now, so there won't be that "aahh" of relief from nicotine withdrawal.  You've already done the withdrawal, physically. 

Best to you.  Apologies if you feel I'm talking down, I am just trying to share my experiences with early quit.

And do please feel free to come here and rant as much as you need to help you.  If someone strikes you as 'talking down" to you (I know it is never intended here), go on to another post... take what helps you and ignore what doesn't.

[Sootie]

43 days is GREAT! Celebrate. I am sorry if you felt we were rude on prior posts......I actually don't remember if I ever responded to you on another post. But I do sort of say the same thing to people at this point........we all smoked for a very long time. I know it feels like it but 43 days is NOT really "so late in your quit". This is still very early days. You probably smoked for 20 years or more.......most of us did. So we really cannot expect to be over smoking in 43 days.

So you are doing nothing wrong and I suspect you are doing everything right. This is just................quitting. I know it is hard to keep fighting the craves.......you feel like "if I have to do this the rest of my life...........FORGET IT!" You won't....but it will take a bit longer than 43 days. I think it was 3 or 4 months before I actually started to feel GOOD about quitting. Feeling GREAT about quitting took a little longer. Until then, I just hung on for dear life, stayed on this site almost 24/7 (even at work which I never do!) and leaned on these great people. Hang in there!!! You CAN do this.

[sweetplt]

43 Days Quit is super...but .. a big but you are still early in the quit and your body and mind are still healing from all those years you were putting chemicals in your body... it takes time....I don’t think I started liking the quit until I was 100 days and until now at 294 I go days without thinking about the smokes....do what you must, but I think if you hang in there it will get better and if not see your Doctor...Gotcha in my Thoughts ~ Colleen. 294 DOF 

[Gwenivere]

I’m at 10 months and while I don’t want an actual cigarette (mostly), I’m tired of not feeling what many do.  So you aren’t alone and with all the wonderful advice above, you may feel much better sooner than you think.  I truly hope so.  I have felt talked down to here a few times and it is a good rule to take what you need and leave the rest.  I don’t know if you have other stressors hitting you now as well.  Timing had it that I got hit by too many while doing this so that makes it harder too.  You have to cut yourself slack on that and get that out if that’s the case.  It’s hard to fight several wars at the same time.  I hope you have real life support too.  I don’t and could really use a human punching bag to help.  I had to accept the obvious as well, that I smoked longer in my life than I didn’t.  So even when I hit a year, it will be a dent in a very large bucket.  My best to you.

[YoungAtHeart]

You don;t really have to WANT to quit, but you must be willing to quit - and that requires some planning and effort on your part.  I hope you aren't arguing with yourself about smoking. You made that decision - so arguing with yourself about it is counter productive.

This IS a journey, and although it seems now that it has been FOREVER, it has only been 43 days....and you probably smoked a lot longer than that  This takes time, and you just have to get through it the best you can. You are obviousy doing something right or you would not have achieved 43 days - which is HUGE, btw!

Just hang in there - there WILL come a day when you won't think about smoking at all - I promise!  Be patient with the process!

Nancy