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Give and get support around quitting

Coyote1
Member

I really need some extra thoughts

I need to kick this. I have tried so many times I feel like I will never be able to truly give it up forever. I work out, run, meditate, paint. I do all of the things to cope. I do not smoke every day. I smoke when I drink heavily...which unfortunately happens more often than it should.

13 Replies
JACKIE1-25-15
Member

Since alcohol is a trigger it may be helpful to abstain from alcohol for a while.  You did not say that you had educated yourself about the addiction to nicotine. Education is the key to a successful quit or you will continue on the merry go round. Start with this topic www.whyquit.com Nicotine 101.  It is an easy read get started there.  The law of addiction

  Administration of a drug to an addict will cause
re-establishment of chemical dependence
upon the addictive substance."

You can quit if you believe you can. 

indingrl
Member

Welcome and education is the key - FACT - It takes 3 days and nicotine is out of your body physically then YOUR get to renew YOUR mind - read all info here- offered bt the EXteam blogs and then practice by learning from other recovering NICOTINE addicts living NICOTINE FREE moment by moment handling life on lifes terms - life still happens - good - bad - mixed up - yuckky days - etc- WE DON'T use drug our NICOTINE to cope - WE renew OUR minds and say out loud - I don't smoke any more - YIU get to choose -  NEW thoughts on how YOU want to live in YOUR own skin and choose YOUR OWN - NEW ideas to deal with YOUR OWN feeling thinking or feeling thought life and YOU get to choose YOUR OWN NEW - NON SMOKER -  life style- YOU choose the changes on the inside of YOUR heart and YOUR OWN NEW MINDSET - YOU and YOU ALONE -  get to be responsible for YOUR OWN LIFE and try the different ways to live as a NON SMOKER - YOU choose to read the blogs by others here - who are sharing what works for them - YOU try whatever way YOU want to live NICOTINE FREE - ONE day at a time - please take what HELPS and let go of the rest - to be HELPFUL is MY only aim - thank you - please remember to blog -  BEFORE -  YOU - take that first puff over YOU - please -  give a chance to HELP -  please know YOU -  can blog -  about anything - YOUR feelings - just need to be venting about whatever OR  - what your doing now to STAY NICOTINE FREE - day by day - gentle hug ❤

Sootie
Member

Alcohol is a strong trigger for you (it is for most of us). So.....sorry to say but you are going to have to avoid drinking for awhile if you really want to be successful in quitting smoking. You have to find a new normal and to do that you have to break with whatever is pushing you to smoke.

Please go to whyquit.com and read the articles there.....education is the KEY to beating addiction. Come here often for support....it is the BEST site for encouragement and support in quitting.

Welcome to EX---we are all here for each other.

YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

Alcohol interferes with your brain function, fuzzies up your commitment and makes you open to the smoking suggestion.  You are going to have to limit your intake to just one drink for awhile if you want to be successful in quitting smoking.  This site is full of tales of quits lost to alcohol.  It's just the way it is, I'm afraid.

The important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it online or at your local library. If you do nothing else to get ready for your quit, please do give this a read.


 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmoking.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. Here is a video to inform you further about nicotine addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpWMgPHn0Lo&feature=youtu.be.

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort after you have tried to delay and distract.   I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  You need to start out with a plan to reduce use of them over time - which the patch does by decreasing the dose contained in them..  For the gum, you can start by cutting each piece in half, then in quarters, then sub regular gum of the same flavor in between, adding more and more regular gum.  For the lozenge, you need to start subbing a mint in between to begin, increasing the number of them over time.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for four reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion,  3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire and 4) you can become addicted to that and it has not yet been proven safe .
 

It will be informative if you do the tracking and separation exercises recommended here on the site. As you track each cigarette smoked, note its importance, and what you might do instead. Put each one off just a little to prove that you don't NEED a cigarette just because you think you do.
 

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.
 
You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:
 https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...
The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!


 Nancy

DonnaMarie
Member

So glad to see you here. EX helped give me the extra push I needed to quit and stay quit. When I was in my 20s, I smoked heavily when I drank beer. Now I don't smoke, and if I want a beer, it's fine without a cig. Our inhibitions go down when drink, so maybe you need to make some choices in that arena for a while.

Read Allen Carr's book (Easy Way) and you'll learn that there is no reason to smoke. Not even once. It's weird to digest, but it saved me.

Looking forward to getting to know  you a little better!

Donna

Day 190

elvan
Member

I lost more than one quit in the past, more than once because of alcohol.  I am not a drinker and when I DO drink, I make no sense.  I did not drink anything alcoholic for the first six months of my quit.  I went to a birthday party for my friend and it was a "pool" party.  Everyone was instructed to wear bathing suits.  I knew I would be among a significant number of smokers who would also be drinking.  Since the party was outside, I figured I would be fine.  I volunteered to keep track of the gifts and write down the giver for my friend, along with a description of the gift.  The only two people I knew who had quit were both smoking again and I was SO DISAPPOINTED.  I took off my white shirt that I was wearing as a cover up over my bathing suit and I hung it on the back of a chair.  I left the party early when I had just started my second beer and I reached for a cigarette and a lighter...they were my brand, sitting right in front of me on the table.  I excused myself and left the party thinking, "WHEW, that was close."  It wasn't until some time later when I went to put that white shirt on again that much to my dismay, I noticed a very large burn hole right in the center of the back.  Someone must have brushed against it and left that reminder of just one of the things smoking can do.  I figured it was quite the sign...oh, the shirt was brand new and the pool party was the first time I had worn it.  I am VERY cautious about drinking even now, after more than five years.  It is NOT WORTH losing a quit over.  

Ellen

Barbara145
Member

If quitting alcohol is a problem there are AA meetings all over the place.  They are pretty wonderful.  You can do this.

sweetplt
Member

Hi and Welcome to Ex’s Coyote1 

I read this and thought it was me who wrote this post...in the last few years I would drink, just so I could make an excuse to smoke...dumb, huh? Anyways, here I am 204 Days quit...and drinking a lot less alcohol...In the beginning of one’s quit...alcohol and other triggers need to be avoided.  If you have a drinking problem, go to AA...otherwise you now will make Quitting Smoking your number one priority...and you can do this...go to My EX Plan | BecomeAnEX and gain knowledge and preparation.  Also, make a quit date and prepare for this day like no other.  Throw all smoking paraphernalia away...keep close to the site for support...we are in this together.  Now go work on quitting....~ Colleen 204 DOF 

/blogs/Maggie_quit_8-1-2010-blog/2012/03/19/100-things-to-do-instead-of-smoking?sr=search&searchId=1... 

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Coyote1
Member

It is so difficult you know.  I developed these horrible coping skills at such a young age. My partner is still deep in his addiction and grumpy about having to quit. This makes for extra difficulty.  We used to do this together.  I need health and peace. Smoking doesn't fit me anymore. I think I do drink more just for the excuse to break my commitment to stop. I miss sitting with my partner and chatting. He sits out side all night.