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Give and get support around quitting

McCarron
Member

getting closer to my quit day

I am counting the days to my forever quit date which is April 1st. I am actually starting to get excited about it. I have been reading as many things as I can, that I think might be helpful in my effort to break free of this PATHETIC 62 year addiction.

 

By the grace of God, and the fellowship of AA I have been free of all mood altering drugs for 44 years. I am grateful for that. I have not been successful with my MANY attempts to quit smoking. I have tried it all. hypnosis, treatment, cold turkey, patches. chantex (omg), acupuncture, nicotine gum...……… the list goes on. I have tried to learn something each time I relapsed and the one thing that I strongly believe,. is that I am not going to be able to stay quit without a strong support group.

 

I have picked up several good tips and  information from you folks that I think will be very helpful. Not only to me but people in my group. I am starting a smokers support group in my home. If the group grows too big, then we will move to a restraunt or wherever I can find a spot for us.

The only requirement for joining the group is a desire to become a non smoker. It will be the blind leading the blind. I will be suggesting that they become members at ex Community . I have a few people who are planning to come to my first meeting and my DR said that he will refer many of his patients to my group.

I have really been trying to be as honest as I can be about my nicotine addiction. I have been looking at how many people have suffered as the result of my smoking. I need to make amends to them. As I was soul searching to do this, I became aware that because of my addiction, I have been extremely self centered. It was like a slap in the face. I was so disgusted with my behavior. It really helped me to see how smoking has warped my mind. I'm not that self centered about any other part of my life. It made me so disgusted with myself. I will get over it once I have made those amends.

WHAT I AM LOOKING FOR IN THIS GROUP IS A FEW PEOPLE WHO WERE CRONIC NICOTINE ADDICTS LIKE MYSELF WHO WOULD BE WILLING TO FOLLOW ME AND GIVE ME SOME TOUGH LOVE WHEN I NEED IT. 

THANK'S TO ALL OF YOU WHO ARE SUPPORTING EACH OTHER. THERE IS POWER IN NUMBERS.

NANCY C

13 Replies
Barbscloud
Member

Welcome to the Ex.  Congrats on your decision to quit and look forward to celebrating your upcoming quit date.  Glad to see your educating and preparing yourself prior.   It's the key to success.  I love that you're forming your own support group.  When I thought about it, I don't think I even know enough people that still smoke to form a group.  With the exception of smoking with some coworkers, I smoked alone.  It's probably safe to say we're all chronic nicotine addicts.  That's why we're here.  If you need support, reach out for here for you.

Barb

JACKIE1-25-15
Member

 It will be the blind leading the blind.

Not good.  Take what you can use and leave the rest.  I am being as honest as you are. FYI  "my honesty" is what my friends here call "tough love".  Love is not tough love is kind.  If your statement above is the truth someone needs to be able to see.  I would suggest that you got some time under your belt in order to lead a group  It is not easy quitting and requires your utmost priority in the beginning.  It takes commitment and willingness to let go in order to quit, not just joining a group.  You have come to the right place to get support to quit smoking. Once you become more educated you could make an EXcellent leader.  We all can use educated support.   Education is the key to a successful quit.  Start first by educating yourself on addiction to nicotine  It is advisable to read Allen Carr's Easyway to Quit Smoking which can be found on pdf on the web.  Another good site to get info is www.whyquit.com.  There are several articles to read.  Nicotine 101 and Freedom From Nicotine My Journey Home.  Quitting takes planning and preparation go to EX Plan | BecomeAnEX  to decide how you are going to go about quitting. To get help on navigating the site go to. Community Help‌.  Again Welcome, there is more to come.  If you have any questions you can do a search with the magnifying to respond glass type any keywords and research.  If you have any questions just ask and give us the opportunity to respond.  We are here for you.  Continue reading.  You opened up some old blogs that I have never read.  Thanks.  The old ones can help just as much as the new ones.  Congratulations on making the decision to quit smoking. 

YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

While I like the idea of a Quit Group, you will need to be careful not to pass around bad information. I would join Jackie in cautioning you about tips.  Let me put it this way:  would you ask someone who doesn't know how to swim, who has almost drowned on many occasions, to teach you to swim?  There is also the danger of someone following another who lapses - proving to them that it IS just too difficult.  I think it might be better to require the group to join Ex (or another like community of their choosing like quitsmokingonline.com or whyquit.com, or the many State quit support sites) and you just get together to share what you have learned from people who seem to know what they are talking about.

The important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it online or at your local library. If you do nothing else to get ready for your quit, please do give this a read. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises recommended here on the site.
 
 After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort after you have tried to delay and distract.   I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  You need to start out with a plan to reduce use of them over time - which the patch does by decreasing the dose contained in them..  For the gum, you can start by cutting each piece in half, then in quarters, then sub regular gum of the same flavor in between, adding more and more regular gum.  For the lozenge, you need to start subbing a mint in between to begin, increasing the number of them over time.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for four reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion,  3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire and 4) you can become addicted to that and it has not yet been proven safe .
 

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmoking.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. Here is a video to inform you further about nicotine addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpWMgPHn0Lo&feature=youtu.be.


The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.
 
You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:
 https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...
The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.
 Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!


 Nancy

sweetplt
Member

Hi and Welcome to Ex's,McCarron

I am happy you found out site and you decided to quit smoking on April 1st...it is a great day to quit as long as it isn't an April Fool's Joke...lol...You sound good and that you are working hard towards that day.  I hope you planned for it like no other...Be sure to read at My Quit Plan to gain knowledge and preparation for your quit date.  Also, keep this list handy...  100+ Things to do instead of smoking 

I am not sure I have tough love in me, but I do help daily here to support everyone in their quit along with my own.  I will do the same for you, you can count on it...Happy Thursday ~ Colleen 108 DOF 

maryfreecig
Member

    Welcome to Ex. Just as with recovery from other addictions, smobriety is a one day at a time journey. Ex is here 365--almost 24hrs a day (the halls go quiet but you can read and blog to your hearts content.) As long as you communicate and participate, you will find many here will respond to you.

    Be prepared to do other things especially first few days when a crave may come along. The craves need not be scary just keep walking the walk. Ex will be here for you, and is right now.

elvan
Member

Welcome to EX, you have gotten some great advice above and I don't think I can add anything...stay close to the site, read blogs, grab ahold of the ones that reach you...don't hang onto the ones that don't.  I am not good at tough love but I will offer lots of support, I am a bit mushy on the tough part.  I came here every morning and every evening when I first quit...I read and I read and I read.  I also talked to anyone and everyone who would listen.  I talked about EX constantly and I am absolutely certain that there are many smokers who wanted to stick a sock in my mouth.  The "sharing" made me stronger.

Welcome.

Ellen

lqsi12
Member

Hey I know you've done your homework, and prepared yourself for your !st day of being smoke free again.  Do you remember what joy that was in your life before ?  The ability to taste wonderful foods, to really smell great smells from a distance, and not have that driving urge to fulfill your addiction?  So happy your joining us, and don't forget,...... the nice bonus, extra cash on hand !  Sure hope you keep us updated ! Best regards 

elvan
Member

McCarron  It is the eve of the beginning of your free life.  Be happy to know that you are not going to be controlled by the addiction any more.  Stay close to the site, let us know how you are doing, WHAT you are doing, and if there is anything we can do to help.

We all want you to succeed.  I had many failed quits before this one which is over five years old and the difference really is EX.

Ellen

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