Colleen,
I remember the feelings you are describing...No Man's Land is real and it is best if we give ourselves a little extra tender loving care while we are there. The strength of the craves will go down...it takes time. Two things, one is something my husband advised me to do when my craves were coming and I didn't think they would ever leave...he is a recovering alcoholic and he told me to get down on my knees and ask God to remove the mental obsession. He said it would not work if I did not get on my knees and that I MIGHT have to do it more than once. I will admit that I didn't have a whole lot of faith in it but I DID it and I had to do it more than ONCE but it really DID work. The other thing that helped me was to remind myself of what a flight attendant says when we are seated on a plane...put your OWN oxygen mask on before you attend to anyone else because you can't help anyone else if you have passed out yourself, clearly, I am paraphrasing. I am glad you saw the "Letter to a Loved One." It's beautiful and very helpful.
Hang in there, it really DOES get better and you are doing an amazing job of reaching out to help others...maybe, just maybe, you need to reach IN for a little while. Offer yourself some of the loving advice and support that you are offering so generously to others.
Hugs,
Ellen
