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Give and get support around quitting

mrskmac
Member

28 days in...

Just found this site and I so need your guidance, please.

Up until now it has been oddly easy to stay smoke free. Even during my "triggers" ie. morning coffee, I could still sit in my chair that I would smoke and drink my coffee and it doesn't make me want a cig. During Thanksgiving I stood outside with My Auntie while she smoked and again zero desire to smoke (it actually stunk). Drinking I thought was really going to be hard, but it's not. I have no issues drinking, even while others smoke.

So why today am I having a melt down...crying uncontrollably, depressed. I don't want a cigarette but I am so over  "thinking" about cigarettes. It seems like every time I turn around I am thinking (briefly) of cigs. Now it's not that I'm thinking "I want one" but more of "normally I would smoke right now" and I move on.

Today because of my emotions, I go Online to search when the "thoughts" stop and I find out it could be never! I cry hysterically, why quit then? It seems overwhelming to think that I will always "think" to some level about smoking, what's the point?

Another thought I had was "wow, I had no idea that cigs are this addictive". I know that sounds weird but I thought I would quit and once I made it past a month it would be easy to stay quit. I'm shocked that how addicted I am.

Thanks for listening.

Kim

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8 Replies
Gwenivere
Member

A lot of what you wrote I can relate to.  I found giving up the actual cigarettes rather easy.  Don’t feel the urge to have one even during craves.  What I want is nicotine and I have that thru patches and lozenges.  I still have my glass of wine before bed and not miss them.  I’m only 11 days in, but very emotional.  I know it’s part of the withdrawl and different delivery.  I hate when my emotions get overblown.  That’s the hardest part for me.  I know a cig won’t change it because then they are stronger than me.  But it is frustrating.  The slightest things get to me.  I pass people smoking and have no judgement, just memories of that being me.  If there in one thing I’ve learned here is anything is normal during this.  One person feels this, another feels that.  It’s vary validating.  Your not alone.  I didn’t even know smoking was addictive til people around me began quitting many years ago.  They were just a part of my lifestyle.  No issues, just what I did.  I’ll tackle the nicotine later.  Even tho I don’t want a cig, I do miss. the instant gratification over this slow delivery.  It’s  quite the adjustment.  Good Luck!

YoungAtHeart
Member

Your body is still adjusting to life without the drug.  This emotional stuff WILL end.  You are entering what we here call No Mans Land (2-4 months quit).  Here is some information on it:  https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex/blog/2011/05/24/no-mans-land-days-30-to130-appr... 

After about 3 months, you will start to notice a morning or afternoon when you didn't think about smoking at all.  Even as time passes before that, you will have chunks of time where you won't think about it.  It gets easier and easier as you get further along. 

As you live your life as an ex-smoker, you might still have a passing thought about it, but that's IT.  There is not anything difficult or worrisome about it.  The journey DOES end...and I promise all you went through to get there will be worth it  - I promise!

Nancy

mrskmac
Member

Thank you, No man's Land was very helpful.

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beazel
Member

First of all, congratulations on 28 days - that's fantastic!

You sound like a strong person and you will get through this, it does get better.

Unfortunately, the only way over it is through it!

Those real uncomfortable moments are only moments, they will pass.

I'm a crier by nature and didn't think I could cry any more than normal - boy was I wrong.

Deep breathing got me through some serious anxiety/depression.

Getting to a new "normal" is quite the journey.

We smoked for years, some of us a lifetime, it can't be undone that quickly and unfortunately time seems to stand still.

Please read and read and read some more about this horrible addiction - there are lots of resources here at Ex.

Education is key!

Keep your commitment. Mindset makes all the difference.

Come here often - all day if necessary - we know what you are going through.

And my go to mantra - Smoking Is Not An Option (still works for me!) No. Matter. What.

KTQ

AnnetteMM
Member

Suffering now means you're on the right path. I know it sucks so bad! Brighter road ahead, though, we promise!

maryfreecig
Member

     No-- you will not feel this way forever. No-- quitters do not feel a compulsion to smoke forever. And quitters do not feel weirdly tempted to smoke forever.

    This is an urban legend. It is not the truth. The brain doesn't work like that--it finally quits remembering cigarettes/smoking and it becomes a matter of eternal vigilance--not to be confused with hyper vigilance. On occasion you may be reminded of smoking, but it will mean next to nothing, easily brushed aside. What you feel today, it's a learning moment not a sign of worse to come.

    I missed out on smoking 43,000 cigarettes --UH, NOT!-- since I quit in October 2017. So glad I quit. You will too as you keep working your smobriety.

Jennifer-Quit
Member

The "thoughts" do stop.  It does get better - just be willing to give it the time that it takes to get to a better place.  It is by far the best decision that I ever made.  Keep it up - 28 days is a wonderful beginning to a life time of freedom!

mrskmac
Member

Thank you Jennifer

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